Curry

robot

What do you call a indian in a lamorgini?

CURRY in a hurry.

Sister

Ken

Sister: (moaning) go get mom, she’d love this Me: but Billy’s with her right now Billy: UGHHHH…MMMMM Dad: hurry up Billy, I want to see you for a moment…

Toilet

Anonymous

Today there was a big test for Little Timmy. During the test, Timmy had to take a really huge shit. So he rushed to the bathroom. He took a while in there. When he was done, he had realized there was no more toilet paper left. Since there was nothing around him to use, the only thing he could do was wipe with his hand. His time in the bathroom was up, and he needed to finish that test! He didn’t have time to wash his hands. So he hurried back. The problem was, the hand he wiped with was his right hand. He used his left hand to complete the test, which made him fail. When he got home, his mother was standing there crossing her arms. “Timmy, the teacher had called and said you wrote sloppy on your test. Why is that?” Timmy replied, “Oh, it’s because I caught a leprechaun with my right hand, but if I opened it my classmates would scare him away, so I had to use my left.” Timmy’s mother glared at him with disbelief. “Timmy, I don’t believe you. Now open your hand!” Timmy did so and opened his hand. “See, mother? I said you’d scare the shit out of him!”

Die

Please

Bully: You’re gonna die. Me: Hurry up then.

Depression

John Wicks Booth

Who works at IHOP? A girl with one leg. P1: Why did the chicken cross the road? P2: To get to the other side DUH?!? P1: No dumbass, its to get run over because he has depression, a chronic illness, and his father left him for a good for nothing pimp that doesn’t even give a shit about how he feels. (Kinda like me). P2: Holy shitr u ok? Some random eavesdropping fucker dials 911 in a hurry

Potato

kitty 34

What did the sweet potato say to the potato when he was told to hurry?

I yamm

Potato

kitty cat 34

What did the potato say when the sweet potato told by to hurry ?

I yamm

Man

Anonymous

at what speed is the curry going at ?

in a hurry to the curry man

German

DAT UTAH GUY (stockton)

Why was the German in a hurry?

Because he was Rush-ian to get to work.

Wife

Death&Decay

2 drunk men spot a pig on some old farmers land.And they were real hungry (or so they said) and they both decided to take the pig with them into their car and eat it somewhere.And so they did and the farmer came out with a gun while they hurriedly drove off, and the farmer said “well goddammit if it was a pig they wanted why didn’t they just take my wife”.

Priest

Tarqa

A little boy went to church… the priest said get in the following positions… stand then kneel then bow… the little boy replies… can u hurry up and fuck me already

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