Wordplay jokes
I have an orphan joke, but it needs parental guidance.
What do you call a Roman with hair in his teeth?
A "glad-he-ate-her".
Where do mathematicians go to die?
The symmetry.
What's white and rhymes with Dre? Eminem.
Q: What do you call a blind German man?
Q: A not-see (Nazi).
Memes
It could be if you believe
Spell 'Imap' and say 'ness' at the end.
I see, you guys jokers are SANS-ational!
What do you call frozen Ibuprofen?
A chill pill.
I just shed my pants.
Why did piglet go to the bathroom?
To search for Poo.
A patient walked into a psychiatrist's office last week wrapped in nothing but Saran Wrap. The psychiatrist said, "I can clearly see your nuts."
what is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
My only friend who actually cares: "Stop making suicide jokes, I’m really concerned!"
Me: Okay, I’ll cut it out.
If you pour paint in your eyes, the paint loses the 't'.
A fat person with autism is a bit like decent sunscreen... A broad spectrum.
What do Rihanna and a DJ have in common?
They know how to get a beat down.
Which animal has the largest chest? A Z-bra.
What separates bad jokes from dad jokes?
Condoms.
What’s the difference between black matter and Black Lives Matter?
Black matter leaves an impact.
My dog is called Syndrome. He jumps up at me and I shout, "Down, Syndrome! Down, Syndrome!"