Wordplay jokes
I was gonna tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort.
I saw my friend hang themselves. My response was, I guess they wanted to hang with someone.
What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A dinosnore!
Why can't orphans go big? When you go big, it's considered family size.
What do you call an autistic person who is a dumbass? A dumbism.
What is a nut that says, "What is your favorite name?"
A magic nut.
I have a friend who's a suicide bomber. He's a blast at parties.
Q. How does an emo scratch an itch? A. With a razor blade.
Look under...
Under where?
You just said underwear!
Gaykelyu
How do you call a cute door?
A-door-able.
What has two legs and is red all over?
Half a cat.
The guard caught one of the fugitives as he tried to escape. All he said was...
"Don't let your guard down."
Say: "eye"
Spell: map
Then say: "enis."
What do you get if you add "ER" onto Hamburg?
Hamburg-ER.
Where do mathematicians go to die?
The symmetry.
Why is Joe cool?
I asked my rigger buddy if he could tie me up later, he said, "I'm a frayed knot."
Why was 6 scared of 7?
Because 7 8 9.
"Man, your jokes about homicide are totally killer!"