Women jokes
Why do men fart louder than women?
Because women can’t keep their mouth shut to build up any pressure.
A man walks into a bar. He takes a seat and asks the barman if he wanted to hear a blonde joke. The barman replies, "Before you tell this joke, I want to tell you something. See the woman over there? She is a black belt in karate, she's blonde. See the bouncer over there? He is also a blonde. See the chick over there with that pool cue? She is also blonde. Also, I have a shotgun behind the bar. I'm blonde. So do you still want to tell your joke?" He replies, "F**k that. I ain't explaining the joke 4 times."
Pro marriage tip: Let your wife know you’re all about women’s rights, especially the right to remain silent, because all appliances should be silent.
There's only one gender. Women are property.
Why is it that when women decide to kill an unborn baby, it's a "CHOICE," but when I decide to drive my F-150 into a playground full of kids, it's called "MURDER"!
Three old women are sitting on a park bench. A man in a trench coat comes and flashes them.
The first woman had a stroke. The second woman had a stroke. The third woman couldn't quite reach.
Today I was asked to go out by 20 girls. -- I was in the women's bathroom.
Why do women get periods?
Just cancel the subscription.
They say give a man an inch, he'll take a mile. What about women? They don't have dicks.
I used to be a baker, but I decided to quit my job and stick my dough inside WOMEN’S bakeries.
How do you put an end to MeToo? Just fill those combined showers with transgender women.
So, I was watching YouTube, and then my friend says, "Those videos never get old." I replied, "Just like a Make-A-Wish kid." After I said that, he shot me in the head and said, "And now neither do you." Now I’m in Heaven, and God says to me, "Welcome to Paradise where it is summer days, clear skies," and I said, "Are there summer women?" Now here I am in Hell with my buddy Hitler. I believe he’s a hero after he killed Hitler.
My wife is a whore, so I pimped her out and broke her mentally and emotionally, taught her a good lesson of being a real woman loyal to her man. End of story, you women are bitches.
Women be like, "Don't say that about her genitals," then makes fun of men's genitals.
90 percent of women kiss with their eyes closed, which is why it's so difficult to identify a rapist.
Women: “Men used to go to war, now they go to clubs.”
Men: “Women used to fear their nudes getting leaked, now it’s $3.99.”
What do women and moldy bread have in common?
A yeast infection.
Why are women like parking spots?
Because all of the good ones are always taken first, and you gotta wait until they're available again.
Cops have the hardest job: they have to tell women they have the right to remain silent and know damn well she will not have the ability.
Wanna know something funny?
- Women's rights.