Woman jokes
A woman went into her garden and danced in front of her vegetables.
The next morning, her corn didn’t grow, and the tomatoes didn’t blush or turn red, but the cucumbers grew four inches.
When men watch football but not the women's version maybe there.
So one time I had a dream where I was on a road trip and we drove a golf cart and a Susan, which I don’t know why the heck the name of the car was called a Susan.
We went into this house and there was like a woman there and we went into this bathroom which looked like a public bathroom, which was so weird!
I got kicked out of the library for putting the Women's Rights book in the fantasy section.
A woman prayed to be a mother everyday for many years until she crossed a road without looking and got hit by a woman driver and died.
When she met God, she asked Him, "How come you didn't answer my prayers?"
God replied, "I did. I kept sending men to rape you, but you kept on choosing to destroy my creations by having an abortion."
A young peasant coming from the field with his scythe on his shoulder notices an attractive young woman that was doing the laundry in a mountain stream, perched on some rocks near a waterfall.
The guy stops and leans against his scythe, fascinated by the young girl's beauty.
After minutes of watching her, she loses her balance, slips on a rock and falls all the way down, crushing her head on the white rocks.
Thoughtful, he puts his scythe back on his shoulder and walks away, saying to himself "Damn, another washing machine destroyed by limestone!"
For every dollar a man makes, a woman makes 70 cents.
That’s unfair! Now the man only has 30 cents!
"Just killed a woman, feeling good."
- Tommyinnit
Women need to be in the kitchen.
Why did the topless woman shout, "Stop raping us?"
Because she was uneducated.
Dad: Johnny, Johnny?
Johnny: Yes, Papa.
Dad: Getting women?
Johnny: Yes, Papa.
Dad: Telling lies?
Johnny: No, Papa.
Dad: Well, you're 100% lying because you get NO WOMEN!
My brother when he sees a girl.
Life is a lot like a penis. It's relaxed, and just hanging there.
It's women that make it hard.
In my mother's generation, they grew up with Wonder Woman. In ours, we have to wonder if she's a woman.
What does the woman say to the cannibal at the fashion show?
"Who are you wearing?"
Your hairline is so bad that it turned Wonder Woman into Failure Man.
Why did the planes crash into the Twin Towers?
Women were flying the plane.
In death, what is the only organ in a woman's body to remain warm?
My dick.
How to trick a gay man into having sex with a woman?
Take a dump on her vagina!
Doctor: Congratulations!!!
Woman: Was it a successful delivery?
Doctor: No, it’s DiGiorno!