Woman jokes
What do you call a woman who aborted her quadruplets? A graveyard.
There’s a woman cutting onions when her husband walks in and starts crying. Onions was a good dog.
I respect woman’s choices... either she wants to cook first, then clean, or she wants to clean first, then cook.
Why aren't women taken seriously in the world? They are too busy whining about getting raped.
I believe in a woman's right to choose...
...whether she wants to cook first and then clean or clean first and then cook.
What did the woman say to the man?
"Stop."
What did the man do?
Keep going.
FUCK MEN IN THE ARSE
What do you call a missing Indian woman?
Bye, I'm Paul Badman. Did you know that you don't have rights? The Articles of Confederation say you don't, and so do I. I believe that until proven innocent, every woman, man, and adult in this country is guilty. And that's why I don't fight for you, Santa Fe!
The man told the women, “Roses are red, violets are blue, you suck cock and you enjoy it too.”
Then she said that's true.
What did the woman say to Michael Jackson at the beach?
"Excuse me, sir, you're in my son."
Q: What are women better than men at doing?
A: Winning arguments.
Q: What are men better than women at doing?
A: Winning swimming titles.
Hi, I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know that you have rights? The Constitution says you do, and so do I. I believe that until proven guilty, every man, woman, and child in this country is innocent, and that's why I fight for you, Albuquerque!
A man was shaving in the bathroom when all of a sudden Bubba, the boy he payed to mow his lawn, comes in to take a piss. The man can't help but look over his shoulder and he is surprised at how well endowed he is, and he asks: "Bubba, what's your secret?"
Bubba replies: "Well, every night before I get in bed with a woman I whack my dick on the bedpost three times. It works, and it sure impresses the girls!"
The man was excited at this easy suggestion and decided to try it that very night, before he went to bed with his wife. So he got to bed and whacked his dick on the bedpost three times and the wife wakes up and says "Bubba, is that you?"
You know why women wear tampons?
So the crabs could bungee jump!
"I'm sorry, Wendy, but I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die."
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman? A combo meal.
If you wait for a woman to get 9 months pregnant and kill her, you will never be able to stop the loop.
A woman once falsely accused me of rape, and I was sentenced to life in prison.
PLEASE CONSIDER LAUGHING now 😂
Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up?
'Cause they don't got balls to scratch.
There was an illegal alien woman who wanted to be called "undocumented." So, I had "undocumented" sex with her and threatened to have her deported if she reported me for rape. I'd call it even.