Without jokes
An old lady told me to check her balance, so I pushed her off the edge without knowing it was her cash she wanted to check, so I died to help her!
What is the difference between a washing machine and a hooker?
I can put a load in the washing machine without it following me.
Americans leave without saying goodbye, and Russians say goodbye without leaving.
Hi guys! Ello here! So I am determined to get as many people as possible to like my jokes and comment. So, without further ado, here goes nothing!
So I have been looking at all your jokes, and UHHHHHH has not been the nicest. I don't really love the words she is choosing, but I'm not going to let her get in my head. :)
So guys make sure that you like and comment! Love y'all!!!!! :D
What do you call a dog with no legs?
My asian neighbors dinner.
I’m really good at algebra. I can replace your X without even asking Y.
Hello guys, imagine if we had no school and we get to do whatever we want without parents telling us what to do! What place would you want to call it and what would the fun things we get to do be? I would call it "Happy world for kids." Leave a comment telling me what it would be called! Enjoy! :)
What do you call a cat with two legs instead of four?
Dead and without use, that's what I feel like.
What hates men but would have no life without men?
A triggered feminist.
Why do orphans eat cereal without milk?
Because their dad never came home from the store.
A guy walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says, "If I can surprise you, I get a free drink." The bartender was unsure but agreed.
The guy pulled a 30cm long pianist out of his pocket, and he starts to play.
The bartender was surprised and gave the guy a free drink.
The guy then says, "You see, I have a little wizard in my pocket that grants wishes. Can I get another free drink if you get a free wish?"
The bartender agrees without hesitation.
The bartender wishes for 1000 bucks, but he gets 1000 ducks.
"WTF!" the man shouts.
The guy answered, "Did you think I wanted a 30cm long pianist?"
What's Michael Jackson's favorite things to say to little boys? "I'd really love to see you-hoo-hoo tonight," and "I can't smile without you-hoo-hoo."
Don't you just hate when you have to eat cereal with water because your dad won't bring the fucking milk? Cause same.
Is Google a girl or a boy?
Obviously a girl, because it won't let you finish a sentence without making a suggestion.
My husband wants to tell me about my childhood.
Ok, I can't access the panel without the password.
In the bus, you can't spell "black" without "back."
What do you call a rapper who can't rhyme?
A rapscallion without the rap.
TELL ME YOU'VE DONE THIS WITHOUT TELLING ME YOU'VE DONE THIS.!!! So, we all know when y'all were in school, y'all would fart, but y'all would try to make it silent, but for me, that one day I farted loud, and everyone could hear. Everyone got to blame the annoying kid.
There was a Mexican magician. He was going to disappear on the count of three.
1-2-..... and he left without a trace.
If there was a quiz on midgets, here’s the Midget quiz and the questions that would be on it:
1. When midgets get high on any drug, do they get high or medium?
2. Do midgets come out the closet or the cabinet?
3. Are Midgets related to Snow White’s 7 Dwarfs?
4. Is a midget just a human without the mushroom in Mario?
5. Was this funny?