Without jokes
A boy is working on his English homework and asks his father for some help. "Dad, what's the difference between 'potential' and 'reality'?"
His dad replies, "I'll tell you what. Go ask your mother if she'd sleep with Robert Redford for a million bucks. Then go ask your sister if she'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a million bucks. Once you have their answers, you'll know the difference."
So the boy goes to his mother and poses the question: "Would she sleep with Robert Redford for a million bucks?"
She answers, "Don't tell your Dad, but yes, I certainly would!"
The boy then goes to his sister and asks her his next question: "Would she sleep with Brad Pitt for a million bucks?"
"Oh definitely!" she answers, without a moment's thought.
The boy goes back to his father, an expression of understanding on his face.
"You're right, Dad, I know the difference now. Potentially, we're sitting on two million bucks. In reality, we're living with a couple of sluts."
What's Michael Jackson's favorite things to say to little boys? "I'd really love to see you-hoo-hoo tonight," and "I can't smile without you-hoo-hoo."
What do black parents and elevators have in common?
Neither of them can raise anything without a belt.
How do you find a black person in the dark without a flashlight?
Tell them a joke to make them smile.
Ukrainians leave without saying goodbye.
Russians say goodbye without leaving.
Palestinians leave without saying goodbye.
Israel says goodbye when the Americans say so.
Americans leave without saying goodbye.
Russians say goodbye without leaving.
What is the difference between Batman and a black man?
Batman can go out at night without Robin.
What's the difference between Batman and a Black man???
Batman can go out at night without Robin.
This is 15 first-year treating a swan.
Students return: "Without payment?"
The word "I die with many important problems."
Later, you answer this point: "DSD, rats?"
What do you call a coffee without water? Africano.
Americans leave without saying goodbye, and Russians say goodbye without leaving.
What do you call a beehive without an exit? Un-bee-lievable!
Why don't booties make good drummers?
They can't keep a beat without making a FART NOISE.
What do you call a rapper who can't rhyme?
A rapscallion without the rap.
Little Johnny walked into class with a black eye, and the teacher said, "Why do you have a black eye?"
Johnny said, "Well, me and my parents have to share a bed, and my dad asked me if I was asleep and I said no, so he smacked me."
The teacher said, "Well tonight, don't say anything."
The next day, Johnny walked in with another black eye, and the teacher said, "Why do you have another black eye?" Little Johnny said, "Well, last night, I did what you said and didn't say anything when my dad asked me if I was asleep. A few minutes later, my dad said he was coming, and my mom said she was coming too. They usually don't go anywhere without me so I said 'Wait for me, I'm coming too.'"
Why did the short person become a chef?
Because they could "microwave" dinner without needing a stool!
Why did the skydiver's parachute fail?
Because it realized it had a better chance of survival without them.
What did the kid without hands get for Christmas? - I don't know, he still didn't open his present...
What's only book rapeboat ever read? Rhyming dictionary, he got no rhymes without it.