Why did Sally stare out the window for 24 hours straight?
Sally's used to being blind!
One day I went to my friend's apartment, and he told me to make myself at home.
I threw him out of the window. I hate having visitors!
So a woman walks into a magician's toy store and browses the collection. Among which was a black, phallic-looking object. She brings it to the counter and asks, "what's this?"
The cashier explains that it's a magical dildo that will listen to whatever you say, "fuck me in the ass," it'll float in the air and fuck you in the ass, "fuck me in the pussy," it'll float in the air and fuck you in the pussy, "faster," it'll go faster, "harder," it'll go harder. She bought this magical artifact and went home for a night of fun and pleasure.
After receiving several orgasms from the magical dildo, she'd had enough, and she told it to stop, but it didn't. The dildo continued to penetrate her, it would go harder and faster, but it refused to stop or slow down. In a panic, she ran over to her car and drove to the hospital to get it surgically removed. Her panic made her disregard the traffic rules, and she quickly found herself pulled over by a cop. As she pulled down her window, the cop leaned towards the door and asked "Do you have any idea how fast you were going!?", the woman tried to explain the situation, she told the officer about the magical dildo stuck in her pussy, but the officer didn't believe her, "magical dildo, my ass" he said, and the lady drove home.
Stephen Hawking only died because he tried to install Windows 10 and his hard drive corrupted
the steven hawkings space telescope will be launched next year, apparently it will have four wheels and run off windows 7
What did the window say to the door?
What are you squeaking about, I'm the one with the panes!
Get it?
FICTIONAL BOOKS / AUTHORS
Why Should I Walk? by Iona Carr
What Lonely Girls Should Do by Seymour Fellowes
Unusual Window Decorations by Rod Curtains
The Long Walk Home by Misty Bus
Race to the Outhouse by Willie Makit and Illustrated by Betty Wont
You so ugly when who were born the doctor threw you out the window and the window threw you back.
Q what is the the favourite song on the people who window dived out of the twin towers
A FREEE FALLIN
What did Stephen hawking say when he died?
"Windows shut down sound"
What's the difference between a blind man and a window?
The window can see through itself.
I felt a window break once. It was pane-full!
When I give you the signal, I want you to roll down your window and call the oncoming cyclist a prick.
One of my earliest memories is seeing my mother's face through the oven window as we played hide and seek, and she said: "You're getting warmer!"
Which room has no doors and no windows?
When you get to feel a dick in you, then suck bro, all your stress [goes] out the window.
Why do crack heads like to do it doggy style?
So one can peep out window and one can peep on floor.
My mom said my sister was an angel, but when I threw her out the window, she didn't fly.
Your arms are open. They stretch towards me, Reaching, grabbing, pulling me, Surrounding me, Drowning me in my helplessness. Time standing still, inside here. Looking through windows, time passing by. Let me go, will ya?
One time I looked out the window and then I saw my sister, and she wasn’t even my sister anymore...
