There are 3 men: an American, a French, and an Italian who have to take a trip and take the plane.
The American puts his hand out the window and says: "We are in America, I touched the Statue of Liberty." The French says: "We are in France, I touched the Eiffel Tower." The Italian says: "We are in Italy, I touched the garbage!"
Why did Leah throw the butter out of the window? To see a butterfly!
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He tried to download a free version of Windows.
Why did Sally stare out the window for 24 hours straight?
Sally's used to being blind!
One day I went to my friend's apartment, and he told me to make myself at home.
I threw him out of the window. I hate having visitors!
So a woman walks into a magician's toy store and browses the collection. Among which was a black, phallic-looking object. She brings it to the counter and asks, "what's this?"
The cashier explains that it's a magical dildo that will listen to whatever you say, "fuck me in the ass," it'll float in the air and fuck you in the ass, "fuck me in the pussy," it'll float in the air and fuck you in the pussy, "faster," it'll go faster, "harder," it'll go harder. She bought this magical artifact and went home for a night of fun and pleasure.
After receiving several orgasms from the magical dildo, she'd had enough, and she told it to stop, but it didn't. The dildo continued to penetrate her, it would go harder and faster, but it refused to stop or slow down. In a panic, she ran over to her car and drove to the hospital to get it surgically removed. Her panic made her disregard the traffic rules, and she quickly found herself pulled over by a cop. As she pulled down her window, the cop leaned towards the door and asked "Do you have any idea how fast you were going!?", the woman tried to explain the situation, she told the officer about the magical dildo stuck in her pussy, but the officer didn't believe her, "magical dildo, my ass" he said, and the lady drove home.
Stephen Hawking only died because he tried to install Windows 10, and his hard drive corrupted.
The Stephen Hawking space telescope will be launched next year. Apparently, it will have four wheels and run off Windows 7.
You're so ugly that when you were born, the doctor threw you out the window, and the window threw you back.
Q: What is the favorite song of the people who window dived out of the Twin Towers?
A: "Free Fallin'"
What did the window say to the door?
"What are you squeaking about? I'm the one with the panes!"
Get it?
FICTIONAL BOOKS / AUTHORS
Why Should I Walk? By Iona Carr.
What Lonely Girls Should Do By Seymour Fellowes.
Unusual Window Decorations By Rod Curtains.
The Long Walk Home By Misty Bus.
Race to the Outhouse By Willie Makit and Illustrated by Betty Wont.
Your mama smells so bad that everytime she goes outside, she gets ticketed for pollution. She's so ugly that everytime she looks out a window, she gets arrested for mooning.
You was reaching into you’re backpack and the whole class jumped through the window.
One time I looked out the window and then I saw my sister, and she wasn’t even my sister anymore...
Your arms are open. They stretch towards me, Reaching, grabbing, pulling me, Surrounding me, Drowning me in my helplessness. Time standing still, inside here. Looking through windows, time passing by. Let me go, will ya?
What's the difference between when I opened the window in a car wash and when Kawhi Leonard did it? At least my dad didn't get shot in the eye.
Yo momma's so fat, she rolled out the bed, out the room, down the stairs, smashed through the window, rolled down the road, and got stuck in the Grand Canyon.
My mom said my sister was an angel, but when I threw her out the window, she didn't fly.
What's the difference between a blind man and a window?
The window can see through itself.
