Why jokes
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because why not?
Why does a leaf fall faster than an emo kid? Because the emo hangs itself.
People named Aaron are annoying. Why have two A’s when you can have none? (Ron)
Why is 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 ate 9.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't make it to home plate.
Why does no one die a virgin? Cause life fucks us all.
Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Because he got hit by a bus!
Why do rappers love the gym?
'Cause they're all about them heavy bars.
Why is it that when women decide to kill an unborn baby, it's a "CHOICE," but when I decide to drive my F-150 into a playground full of kids, it's called "MURDER"!
Why did the number 5 get voted out of the game in the 1st round? Because he was an odd man out!
Why do scuba divers fall backwards off of the boat?
Because if they fell forward, they'd still be on the boat.
Why can't the T-Rex cross the road?
Because he's extinct.
Why does Spiderman only have 11 months in his calendar?
Because he lost May!
So I heard it was important to clean your sex toys, which is why priests invented baptism I guess.
Q: Why can’t orphans play baseball?
A: They don’t have a home to run back to.
Why are Muslims not fond of American cops?
Because Muslims don't like pigs!
Why are kids so skinny?
Parents eat all the food themselves, and let the kids starve.
Why is there no medication in Africa?
Because doctors advised, "You don't take it on an empty stomach."
Why did the Down syndrome person cross the road? Because there was a zebra crossing!
So, three guys are walking down the street together and decide to go rob a bank.
The first one goes for the richest man in the city’s vault but can’t open it easily and is caught and sent to death in jail for robbing the richest man.
The second one goes for his uncle's vault because screw that son of a b***h; he’s rich, why does he need all the money? But his uncle was unfortunately at the vault that day and snapped his nephew's neck.
The third one went for his ex’s vault and thought, “Well, that b***h can suck my d**k; she’s so poor anyway, who would care if I take all her money so she dies of hunger and dehydration and homelessness?” So he managed to get into her vault easily because it wasn’t heavily locked and took all her money. The next day, the third guy's ex showed up to his house and said, “I’m gonna f*****g murder you,” so she shot him dead and got her money from his house.
In hell, the three guys see each other and explain what happened. The third guy did and then asked, “You know, I don’t get it. If the richest guys are heavily guarded but already have so much money in their house, why does it need to be heavily guarded? I don’t understand why the poorer aren’t heavily guarded when they are so poor they need the money.” And the first guy said, “B***h, I don’t know, maybe the bank tellers think poor people should suck it and just die already.”