Why jokes
Why is September 11th the best birthday?
Everyone remembers it! :)
You wanna know why Stephen Hawking isn't going to heaven?
Because it's a stairway, not a ramp.
Why is it bad to climb a tree?
You might fall on an orphan! 🫥
Why did God give women legs?
1. To look at.
2. To wrap around your neck when you’re eating her out.
Why do they act so emo?
Because they are all retards.
A son walks up to his dad and says, "I'm so gay right now!"
"HOW COULD YOU? I THOUGHT YOU WERE STRAIGHT!!!" screams the dad.
"No, gay as in HAPPY," says the confused son, "I'm so happy right now!"
"Oh," says the dad, "why are you happy?"
Then the son said, "Because I just got 20 dollars for sucking a guy off."
Why did the emo get put at the back of the line? He cut himself.
Why can't Juice WRLD hit rock bottom?
Because he's too high.
All doggies go to heaven - or so I've been told.
They run and play along the streets of Gold.
Why is heaven such a doggie-delight...
Why, because there's not a single cat in sight.
Why couldn't the orphan play baseball?
Because he can't get home.
Why was Michael Jackson so loved? He touched so many children in so many special ways.
A guy dies and finds himself in Hell. Despondent, he sits on the ground and weeps uncontrollably.
Demon: "Why so sad, my friend?"
Guy: "What do you think? I'm in hell!"
Demon: "Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here. You a drinkin' man?"
Guy: "Sure, I love to drink."
Demon: "Well, you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays, that's all we do, is drink. Whiskey, tequila, vodka, beer... We drink till we throw up and then drink some more."
Guy: "Gee, that sounds great!"
Demon: "You a smoker?"
Guy: "You better believe it."
Demon: "Alright! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from around the world and smoke our fucking lungs out. If you get cancer, it's ok, you're already dead!"
Guy: "Golly."
Demon: "I bet you like to gamble."
Guy: "Yes, as a matter of fact, I do."
Demon: "Good, because Wednesday is gambling day. Craps, blackjack, horse races, you name it."
Guy: "Wow."
Demon: "You like to do drugs?"
Guy: "Well, I love to do drugs. You don't mean..."
Demon: "That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. Smoke a joint the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want, and if you overdose, it's ok... You're already dead!"
Guy: "Neat! I never realized hell was such a swingin' place!"
Demon: "You gay?"
Guy: "Uh, no."
Demon: "Ohhh... You're gonna hate Fridays...."
Why should you never tell your French doctor that you bite your tongue?
Because your French doctor will give you a tetanus shot.
Why is death taken so lightly? It's terrible how people use it! (This is NOT a joke!)
Why is it okay to hit orphans?
It's not like they can tell their parents.
Why did Technoblade die?
Because God wished him dead for all the orphans he made fun of.
Why don’t Mexicans have sex education and a driver’s education on the same day?
Because the donkey gets tired.
Why do doctors use so much lipstick?
Because they love cos-medics!
Why did the turkey cross the road?
Answer:
To prove it wasn't chicken!
Emos are weird to me because they dress up all black, and you know I don't like that, so that's why I don't like it.