Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt-quack.
Why Jokes
Why does Peter Pan always fly? Because he Neverlands.
Why did the blind man fall down the well?
He couldn't see that well.
Today, I asked my phone, "Siri, why am I still single?" and it activated the front camera.
Why can’t Jesus be born in West Virginia?
Because they couldn’t find three wise men or a virgin.
Why is Santa always so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
Why isn’t there a pregnant Barbie doll?
Ken came in another box.
Why do vegetarians give anonymous blowjobs at the glory hole at an adult book store? Because they don't want anybody to find out that they like meat.
Why do people in a wheelchair make bad jokes? Because they are bad at stand-up.
Why did the blind man fall down the well?
He just couldn't see that well.
Three drunk men get in a taxi. The driver knew they were drunk, so he started the car and turned it off. The first man gave him the money. The second man thanked him, but the third man slapped the driver. The driver, surprised that he noticed, asked why, and the third man replied with, "Why did you drive so fast?"
Why couldn't the emo kid hang himself?
After eating through his feelings, the belt wouldn't fit around his neck.
A man asks a woman, "Are you a school?"
The woman replies, "No, why?"
The man says, "Oh, I wanted to shoot my kid inside of you."
Why did Hitler kill himself?
His gas bill was too high.
Richard: Mom, someone called me gay.
Richard's mom: Why didn't you slap him across his face?
Richard: No, I couldn't.
Richard's mom: Why?
Richard: Because he was cute.
Why did the tomato blush? -- Because it saw the salad dressing.
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to the Super Bowl game.
They had great seats right behind their team's bench.
After the game, the guy asked his girlfriend how she liked the experience.
"Oh, I really liked it!" she replied, "Especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."
Dumbfounded, her boyfriend asked, "What do you mean?"
She said, "Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!' I’m like, hellooooo! It’s only 25 cents!"
Why did 10 die? -- He was in the middle of 9/11.
Why did the skeleton not rob the bank?
He did not have the guts!
Why didn't the toilet paper make it across the road?
It got stuck in a crack.
