Why jokes
Chuck Norris has been to Mars... that's why there are no signs of life there.
You know why I don't buy Velcro items anymore?
They are a total rip off.
Do you want to know why they call it an orphanage? Because they couldn't call it orphans home.
"I'm not sure why my girlfriend's father doesn't like me."
"What was your first impression on him?"
"I told him, she calls me daddy too."
Why did the electron leave the atom?
Because it had its ion someone else.
Today, I asked my phone, "Siri, why am I still single?" and it activated the front camera.
Why did the Secret Service detain Johnny Depp at the White House?
Because he was about to kick the cabinet.
Why don't orphans like to get lost?
Because somebody's going to ask where their parents are.
Wonder why the British are so good at chess? They have the queen.
Wonder why Americans are so bad at chess? They lost two towers.
Roses are red, I don't know why, Living is hard, I want to die.
Why are women like hurricanes?
They come in nasty and wet, then leave with your house and car.
Why did Hitler never go to a strip club?
He hated the Poles.
Why can't Asians play cricket? They'll eat the bat.
I turned off all the beeping machines in the hospital. I love the peace and quiet, but I don't know why everyone is sleeping cause it's only 8 am.
Why does Helen Keller hate the national anthem? Oh, say, can you see?
Why do priests like kids in wheelchairs? Because they can’t run.
Two lesbians adopted a cat. That night, the cat ran away. Why?
Because it heard one say, "I'm gonna eat that pussy."
Why did Mozart kill all his chickens?
When he asked who the best composer was, they all replied, "Bach, Bach, Bach."
Why can't Michael Jackson ever win in a race? Because he always comes in a little behind.
Why is Stephen Hawking a bad role model? -- He doesn't stand for anything.