Whos jokes

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Not your parents.

I heard there was a kidnapping.

Don't worry, he woke up in the back of a van.

It was his father's friend who was a priest.

He was just bringing him to church.

Why'd the girl fall off the swing?

'Cause she had no arms.

Knock, knock!! Who's there?

Not the girl.

Who hates going to a pizza party?

A weirdough.

Did you know about the guy who invented knock knock jokes?

He won the no-Bell prize.

Do you want to know my motto when I’m bored?

Punch an orphan, who is he going to tell, his mom?

When the person who killed JFK heard "headshot."

My girlfriend broke up with me, so I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?

*True story*

I saw this guy with a very bad hairline who was painting himself blue and it said "Smurf Paint," but I shouted, "Megamind!"

Your hairline is so bad when you need a role model who has been having a tough life, you go to your barber.

Me: Knock knock. Bestie: Who's there? Me: Ben. Bestie: Ben Dover? Me: No, Ben vuyictrbjovtfcybugxrrx. Bestie: Omg how did I forget, hi vuyictrbjovtfcybugxrrx!

You telling me Julius Caesar, who has been dead for well over 50 years, made this salad?

Even people who are good for nothing can bring a smile to your face.

For instance, when you push them down the stairs.

Did you hear about the guy who was arrested for stealing luggage? Unfortunately, he lost his case.

Sparkling water was invented by Germans. Who else would add gas?

Who were the greenest Presidents in US history? The Bushes.

If I ever find the doctor who screwed up my limb replacement surgery... I’ll kill him with my bear hands.

Where can a gay male that is abled bodied find the location of a glory hole if he is looking for a free and anonymous blowjob from another gay male?

From a physically disabled gay male who is either at the gym 💪 💪 🏋️‍♂️ or at the rest area ♿️ 🚹 🚽.

Who is not hungry in Africa?

A dead person.

I took my sister and cousin to a sleepover with lil Diddy, who my dad's friend has connections with.

I think the experience went fine, but they were traumatized. We got what we wanted.