Whos jokes

There's a new Michael Jackson biopic in the works. There is a possibility that we will know who his love interest was.

What we know so far: Billie Jean is not his lover, and that kid [seen with him] is not his son. We also know that Michael Jackson said that sharing his bed with little boys is "healing" and an act of "sharing the love," so take that as you will.

One dark stormy night when I was 8 years old, I woke up in the middle of the night busting to pee. Half asleep, I walked down the stairs and toward the bathroom and heard a strange whirring sound that sounded like a ghost. When I opened the door, I felt a strange cool breeze and the light came on automatically, and the ghostly sound stopped. Terrified, I did what I had to and went back to bed.

The next 3 nights, the same thing happened, and finally, I decided I had to tell my mom no matter how hard to believe it sounded. The next night I woke up, I went into my parents' room and woke my mom up and said, "You have to come with me and see this, it's really important." Half asleep, she murmured, "Oh, what is it? Can't it wait until the morning?" I pleaded, "No, you have to come see, our bathroom is haunted by a ghost. When I go in the middle of the night, I can hear a ghost sound. Then when I open the door, I feel the cold as it swoops through me, and the light comes on automatically." She yawned and said, "Oh, so that's who's been peeing in the refrigerator."

What do you call a hillbilly girl who's faster than her brothers?

A redneck virgin.

If Joe Biden and Kamala Harris jump off a cliff, who survives?

Americans...

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Interrupting Cow.

Interrupting Co- MOO!

Did you hear about the four foot tall psychic who escaped prison?

He's a small medium at large.

A man who drinks a lot is told by his wife that if he ever gets drunk again she will leave him.

Later, the man goes to a pub and drinks a lot and throws up all down his jacket. 'Oh no,' he says to his friend, 'if I go home like this again, my wife will leave me.' 'Don't worry,' his friend says. 'Put a £20 note in your jacket pocket. When your wife challenges you, produce the money and say another man threw up on you and gave you the £20 note for the dry cleaning.' 'Brilliant!' the man says and goes home. He walks through his front door and his wife sees him. She is furious. 'No no,' the man says, producing the money from his inside pocket. 'A man threw up on me and gave me £20 for the dry cleaning.' 'What's the other £20 note for?' asks his wife. 'Ah, that's from the man who shat in my pants.....'

Small word of advice: Don't wait till next month or next year to do stuff with the people you love, because they may be gone by then. You don't realize, but every second there is someone who dies, and it just could be your loved one.

We should stop.

Wait, but who is the orphan going to tell?

The boomerang!

What do you call a daredevil Weedle who does stunts on a motorcycle?

Weedle Knievel.

What mountain cries the most?

A mountain under water.

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

UR MUM!

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Malaysian Airlines Flight 303!

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Broken pencil.

Broken pencil who?

Never mind, it's pointless.

Who remembers when Gwen was the only thing people talked about on this website?

"Knock, knock.""Who's there?""Kid.""Kid who?""Kidnap you!"

I pushed an orphan and they said, "I'm telling!" I asked, "Telling who? Your parents?"

Jimmy: Why did the chicken cross the road?

Joe: Why?

Jimmy: To get to the idiot’s house.

Jimmy: Knock knock.

Joe: Who’s there?

Jimmy: It’s the chicken.

Wanna know who can jump the highest? Emo kids, some of them are still in the air.

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Knife." "Knife, who?" "How are you still alive? I just stabbed you!"