When jokes
What do you get when you mix alcohol with literature?
Tequila Mockingbird.
Why should you wrap your hamsters in duct tape?
So they don't explode when you f*** them.
Leo is like a cloud... when she disappears, it's a beautiful day.
Damn boy, you must be Nick Cannon because you don’t know when or how to stop.
My screen lock is my favorite picture of my wife. When I'm on a 14-hour shift, being miserable, hating my life... I pull out my phone and gaze at the picture of my wife. Then I realize it's better here than at home with her ass.
Why don't rappers ever play hide-and-seek?
Because good luck hiding when your name's always dropping!
What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?
A money manager who counts bars.
What did the rapper say when he lost his voice?
"I guess I'll have to drop a SILENT TRACK!"
What's the funniest thing you ever read? For me it was when Rapboat told me he was a legit rapper.
What did the duck do when he crossed the road?
The duck jumped into a pool of ant piles! 💀💀
Why do blonde prostitutes prefer blowjobs?
They hate it when you hand it to them.
How do you know if a rapper's broke?
When he starts dropping cents instead of bars.
Israel is so fat, when he goes to KFC and they ask what size bucket he wants, he says, "The one on the roof!"😂
A guy told a beautiful girl, "Hey, I want to make love to you. If I throw $2000 when you go to pick it up, that's when I'll go. Is that okay?"
She called her husband, and he said, "Okay, but pick it up fast so he doesn't have time to pull his pants down."
Four hours later, she shows up to her house and tells her husband, "THAT FUCKER PAID IN COINS!"
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
For when he made it RAIN in the club.
Q. What do ghosts do when they get hurt?
A. They call an AmBOOlance.
What does your mom say when she is working?
Nothing, it's rude to talk with your mouth full.
What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? Glock, glock.
The people in Florida yelling "White Power!" is amusing, because when they get permanent sunburn from the Florida sun, they are not white anymore.
Why are Americans so shocked when it comes to Mexican drug cartels?
Because none of the drug lords (or their associates, for that matter) have shot up a school.