Wheelchair jokes
What do you call two old men drooling in their wheelchairs?
The 2028 US election.
If there is a guy in a wheelchair and he is a bully, say, "I’m still standing."
One time I broke a leg and I was using a wheelchair.
My parents thought I was a disappointment and put me up on eBay, the Ohioan Black Market, and the nearest adoption center.
What do you call a transgender person in a wheelchair?
An Autobot.
What do you call a person in a wheelchair that lives in Africa?
Dry Vegetable.
What do you do when you see a lady in a wheelchair?
You grab a stick and put it through the wheelchair and call her nunchucks.
I was in a wheelchair for a few weeks last month.
I went through a super traumatic experience, and I *wheely* hope I made a good *roll* model!
My friend in a wheelchair is autistic and tried to fight me, so I said: "If you wanna fight me, I'll run up the stairs, and by the time you get up the stairs, I'll already be down the stairs waiting," and he started crying.
A man sees a crying woman by a pond. She is in a wheelchair and has no arms or legs.
He asks her why she is crying, and she answers that she has never been hugged. Feeling pity, he hugs her, then jogs away.
The next day, he finds her crying again, and she says she has never been kissed. The man kisses her and jogs away again.
On the third day, the man sees her crying and asks her thrice. She tells him she has never been fucked. The man picks her up and throws her in the pond, telling her, "You're fucked now!"
I just went on a date with a woman in a wheelchair.
I stood her up, which made her fall for me. At first it was a drag, but now we’re rolling.
Pop in the toilet.
Today I was at PE, and I saw a kid in a wheelchair. I threw a basketball at him, and I yelled, "Rocket League!"
Yo mama is so fat that her wheelchair had to be made into a couch!
My girlfriend just broke up with me because I held a door for another girl. She said I was cheating, but the girl I helped was in a wheelchair.
What makes a healthy normal man different to a disabled man?
"They can move it, move it." (from King Julian)
What makes a healthy normal man different to a disabled man?
"I'm still standing, yeah, yeah, yeah!" (from Elton John)
What do you call a person in a wheelchair with a speaker?
Rolling Loud 🎸🎸
What do you call a paraplegic cannibal?
"Dine and dash."
I broke up with my girlfriend and stole her wheelchair.
Guess who likes vegetables now?
A kid in a wheelchair got hurt yesterday. I got detention yesterday because I told him to walk it off.