What does Can do after eating its vegetables?
Go on eBay to see how much he can sell the wheelchair for.
Wheelchair Jokes
Steven Hawking had dark humor.
Whenever he turned on his laugh effect, it diverted power from his screen brightness.
I asked my mom what is dark humor. She said "see them boy over there in the wheelchair, ask him to walk." I said, "but I’m blind." She responded, "Exactly."
I bought my fat wheelchair son a treadmill for his birthday, then that big brainless special motherfucker cried over it and threw a fit cuz his fat special ass couldn't get up out of his wheelchair and said for Jesus to raise him up and give him working and movable legs.
My son is such a miserable brat, I bought him a brand new trampoline for Christmas and all he wants to do is sit in his wheelchair and cry.
What has 4 wheels, no wings, and flies?
A dead cripple.
What’s the hardest part about making vegetable soup?
To put the wheelchair in the pot.
Person 1: “You assume I’m gay because I have rainbow hair, I’m wearing a rainbow shirt, and I have a rainbow pride flag behind me?”
Person 2: “You assume I’m disabled because I have deformed arms and limbs, no legs, and I ride around in a wheelchair?”
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that lives with the royal family?
Rolls Royce.
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into the school fire and said, "Hot wheels!"
Have you ever wondered why you never see a gay guy in a wheelchair?
It’s hard to become a vegetable when you’re already a fruit.
Dad: Son, do you want to play Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots?
Son: Sure, let me get it from the closet.
Dad: No, bring your sisters. Just like the game, they can’t move their legs.
A wife says to her husband, "You're always pushing me around and talking behind my back." "What do you expect?" he says, "You're in a fucking wheelchair!"
How do you ground a person in a wheelchair?
Take off the wheels!
What’s better than winning the Paralympics wheelchair race?
Walking.
What do you call two old men drooling in their wheelchairs?
The 2028 US election.
If there is a guy in a wheelchair and he is a bully, say, "I’m still standing."
One time I broke a leg and I was using a wheelchair.
My parents thought I was a disappointment and put me up on eBay, the Ohioan Black Market, and the nearest adoption center.
What do you call a transgender person in a wheelchair?
An Autobot.
What do you call a person in a wheelchair that lives in Africa?
Dry Vegetable.
