Whats jokes
What do crows get after they buy a phone?
A cawing card.
What’s a sheep’s favorite song?
"Baby Don’t Herd Me."
What is smegma name?
Today my idiot brother screamed, "Ahhhhh, I'm dead!" But it wasn't really, so I decided to make it a reality until my sister came...
AND HELPED ME! - for once, but then two minutes later my mom showed up. We killed him right in front of her, and she screamed! "Donuts and pizza for you and more if you go to Mrs. Roberts' house and say hi and bye to Daddy!!!!!" And she hands us both a sharp tool, and I say, "What about Tommy??!!! Aren't you MAD!!!!!!!" Then she replied, "Who's THAT!!??? Coz he ain't mine. His name is Tommy, Tommy Roberts."
So then me and my sister visit Mrs. Roberts, and she said, "Oh, this isn't anything important. Go home!" So then my sister and I say hi! and do a countdown. After that my Nike white jumper had turned red! IT WAS A MUCH BETTER COLOUR, MUM SEEMED TO APROVE AS WELL! 😊😊😊 But then the police question us where daddy was, so then Mom said....................... oh he's moved on! So then the police officer was like, "Ahem, ma'm where!" SO THEN I BELLOWED.......................... UP - UR -A##. And we got let off the hook, then we moved oh and we k!lled the cop 2 and oh did i meantion we HAD a maid, and a landlord and a cat but they were all 2 annoying so we got rid of them and now our new backyard is very smellyyy and i dont think there is enoff space to put muummy anymore so now i dont think sissy will fit either🧐 i will ask my neibour nessy she'll obviously say YES or ill........................................
ok like for part two☺☺☺
What do you call a man who can fly? A flying man.
What are they going to say about Tim Gunn in 20 years?
He kicked the bucket.
A girl and a boy were on a date. The boy kept farting. The girl asked, "What is wrong?!?". The boy replied, "Explosive diarrhea.". The girl said, "Ew".
The boy went to the bathroom, and the place exploded. The center of the explosion, the bathroom.
What do you call a funny family of chairs? A sitcom!
What would you call a mom cat and a kitten walking together?
KIT-KAT :p
What did the traffic light 🚦 say to the car 🚗? Don’t look, I’m about to change!
What's the most common thing between Hitler and an emo?
Hitler knows when to kill himself!
What does NASA stand for?
Nose and smelly astronauts.
What does a dick and an elderly person have in common? They are both short.
Q: What did the fetus say to the tongs?
A: See you on the flip side.
What is Stephen Hawking's mum?
Your mum!
Not totally a joke but... What do all these rape joke naysayers have in common with rapists? They are also forcing themselves on others.
What is the difference between an orphan and Pokemon?
People choose Pokemon.
What do you call a Panera Bread doctor?
A Panera med.
What does a duck and a tablespoon have in common?
Both are not a lamp.
What did the hermit crabs do on Mother's Day?
They shellabrated their mommy.