Whats jokes
What’s an Emo’s favorite exercise?
The dead hang.
What type of jam do aliens like?
Space Jam!
An emo girl jumped out of a tree at the same time a feather fell to the ground... What hit the ground first?
The feather, the girl was stopped by a rope.
Jump in the Cadillac. (Girl, let's put some miles on it.) Anything you want. (Just to put a smile on it.) You deserve it, baby, you deserve it all, And I'm gonna give it to you. Gold jewelry shining so bright, Strawberry champagne on ice, Lucky for you, that's what I like, that's what I like. Lucky for you, that's what I like, that's what I like.
-Tommyinnit
What makes emos jump?
Bridges.
What do you call a herd of cows masturbating?
Beef strokin' off.
What’s another name for a woman giving birth?
Unloading the dishwasher.
Me: What's that sound?
Ex: What?
Me: Oh, it's the elevator going up. BYEEEE see you on another level!
What's a pirate's favorite shop?
Arrrrrrrrgos.
What do you call your Indian best friend who is the ABSOLUTE BEST at cunnilingus? A Curry Muncher.
What did the skeleton say when his girlfriend said, "I'm gonna break your heart?"
He says, "Go ahead, you're not breaking my 206 healthy bones!"
What did the salad dressing say to the tomato?
"Don't look! I'm dressing!"
What do McDonald's and priests have in common?
They both stick their meat in 10 year old buns.
What games would deaf people not be good at?
Simon says and Musical chairs.
What do you call a person in a wheelchair?
Anything they can't catch you.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter, he's not coming.
What's the difference between Bird flu and swine flu?
For one you get tweetment, for the other you get oinkment.
Me: What do you call a group of retards?
Friend: Down town?
Me: Nope, target practice.
What's the difference between me and a hairdresser? We both cut too much.
What do you call a fat chick with a rape whistle?
Optimistic.