Whats jokes
What do people that can only use half their face and wankers have in common?
They have both had a few strokes.
What noise did Steven Hawking make when he died?
Windows shutting down.
What did the shoe say to the other shoe?
Nothing, it was tied up in another conversation.
What do you call a lazy piece of meat?
A meatloaf.
What's the best thing about Switzerland?
I don't know, but the flag is a big plus.
Memes
gravity falls
What do you do with a dead scientist?
You barium.
What’s the point in a cow going to the cinema? To be a-moo-sed!
What side of the sidewalk do crazy people walk on? The psych-o-path.
What's the difference between a blonde and the Panama Canal?
One's a busy ditch.
What do you call a midget that waves? A microwave.
What do you call a person with no arms or legs at your front door? Mat.
What time are most dentist appointments? Tooth hurty.
What do you call a party with 100 midgets? A little get together.
Q: What did Britney say to Kevin when they were in bed?
A: "Hit me baby one more time."
What does Micheal Jackson and a rock have in common?
They are both hard.
What's the difference between an emo and a banana?
They both hang like apples.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite drink? Mi-hee-lk.
What did the tower say to its twin? "Hey, is that a plane?"
Doctor asks his patient, "What is your zodiac sign?"
Patient replies, "Cancer." Doctor says, "What a coincidence!"
What do you call a male prostitute in a bar...
Handy Andy.