Whats jokes
My friend's dad died during 9/11. He was such a good pilot, but my friend kept disturbing him, so when his dad died, he said, "It was you who killed me" (to the child).
So the child said, "Yoo-hoo? What type of name is Yoo-hoo, but Yoo-hoo, Yoo-hoo come here, I need to kill you NOW."
If Red gets voted out, what happened?
Red is not voted out, Red is a hacker, so he kills Blue. OK, so someone found Blue's body. Red said, "Where?"
Lime, Green, and Purple said, "How is Red not dead?"
Red: "I am a hacker, you noobs!"
Lime, Green, and Purple run.
Red killed them all. Red is the win, but he is not the win.
Black killed Red. Black is the win.
LOL
Q: What’s a koala's face song? A: Never gonna give you up BECAUSE it hangs on the tree and the person is the tree?
My wife walked in on me cheating on her and said, "How could you cheat on me?!" I said, "She was lying naked on the table what I was supposed to do?" and my wife responded with, "Perform the autopsy."
What's the difference between a cat and a human? About 500 bullets.
What did the white girl say to the black girl?
"Where's the back?"
What do you call a baby that came out of their mother's womb? A virgin.
Student: What's the best thing in the world?
Teacher: I don't know what.
Student: Hard rock cock.
Q: What do you call a person with Down's syndrome who smokes weed?
A: Baked potato.
What's the difference between a white kid and a computer?
The child has no trouble shooting.
What do you call a pig who does karate?
Pork chop!
What did the 1.8 nanosecond old baby get for his birthday? Nailed to a puppy falling on a buzz saw being crushed in a hydraulic press while being set on fire.
This Chinese girl didn't know what a sausage roll was, so I replied, "It's like a spring roll with sausage in it, but not any dog or cat how you have it."
What's black and at the top of the staircase? Stephen Hawking after a house fire.
What's a similarity between blondes and a vacuum cleaner? You have to turn them on before they start to suck.
What's the difference between me and Spongebob?
Spongebob can actually get ripped.
What does the cow say when it's going on holiday? - MOOOOOYORK.
What do you call a dead black plantation worker? Fertilizer.
What's the difference between sex and mental illness?
Most of Reddit has experienced mental illness.
What present can a pimp always buy his hoes to both show how much he thinks of them and know they can never get enough of?
Condoms!