Q: What's the best thing about fucking 28 year olds?
A: There's 20 of them.
Whats Jokes
What did the skeleton say to the other skeleton? "You're dead to me."
What do you call being run over by Michael Jackson?
Being hit by... Being struck by... A smooth criminal.
What happened when the cheetah took too many baths?
He became spotless!!!
Q: What's black, white and red all over?
A: A blushing zebra? No, Michael Jackson after a Pepsi advert.
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and acne?
Acne waits until you're 13 to come on your face.
What’s the difference between a retard and a zombie? Nothing much, they both dribble, moan, are hungry, walk weirdly, and it takes a bullet in the head to put them both down.
What do you call a cow with two legs?
Answer: Your mom.
What did the dentist say when he looks into a patient's mouth?
"I C D K"
You know what I see?
DICK
What's the best thing about dating a blind chick?
She can't identify you.
What do an angler fish and a pedophile have in common?
They both like to hide in dark places, look creepy, and like to lure small creatures.
What do you call an atheist bone? -- A blasfemur.
What do trans men and Pinocchio have in common?
Both are lying when they say "I'm a real boy."
(I'm a trans man myself lol)
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The exylo-bone!
What do you call a mountain of kittens?
A meowtain.
What do you call a deaf animal?
Anything, it can't hear you.
Doctor approaches a patient in Hospital and says, "I have some good news and bad news."
So the patient says, "What is the bad news?" the Doctor replies, "I have had to amputate both your legs." So the patient says, "Well, what is the good news?" The Doctor replies, "I have found someone to buy your slippers."
What's the same between a pregnant 14 year old and her fetus? They're both saying "Oh my god, my mom's gonna kill me!"
What do you call a couple Mexicans getting stoned in a bush? Buches baked breans.
What song does Saturn sing?
"If you like it then you should have put a ring on it."
