Whats jokes
A father and three sons are renovating a house when a wall of that house collapses and breaks the father's back. Keeping calm, he tells the sons, "Well, I guess this is what you would call back-breaking labor." He chuckled, then passed out from pain.
What is the difference between your girlfriend and your sister?
They're both "sweet home Alabama."
A woman has been raped by a man. She calls the police, and a policeman shows up.
Woman: "Please help, officer! I have been raped!"
Officer: "No problem, ma'am, I will just unrape you."
Woman: "What? Unrape me? How?"
Officer proceeds to bring back the rapist and forces the woman to rape the rapist back in order to cancel out the initial rape.
What did the left butt cheek say to the right butt cheek? "Together we can stop this shit!"
Woman: What’s a good comeback for my sexist husband when he tells me to go make him a sandwich?
Husband: I know! How about you COMEBACK with a goddamn sandwich?
Memes
Lol same
What do you call a fruit that argues against the position it supports?
The Devil's advocado.
What is black and white and is dead?
My Chemical Romance.
What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.
What's the best part about having emo grass?
It cuts itself!
What do you call a cow that is really sad? Utterly Depressed. HEHEHEHE
What did Luke Skywalker say when he saw someone bullying his sister?
You better not lay a finger on her!
What do a priest and a Christmas tree have in common? They both like fairies sitting on them.
Robin: "The car's not working."
Batman: "Did you check the battery?"
Robin: "What's a tery?"
What country do French Fries come from? Grease.
Why aren't orphans good at Monopoly?
They don't know what a house is.
Hookers are like drive-thrus; you tell them what you want, pay for your stuff, and leave.
What do you call a Russian prostitute? Slobadown Mycockyoubitch.
What did the egg say to the boiling water?
It might take a while for me to get hard because I just got laid last night.
What is long and black? The line at Popeyes.
"What did the blind, dumb, paraplegic, dead, eight-year-old child get for their birthday?"
"Cancer."