Whats jokes

What do Michael Jackson and Tesco carrier bags have in common? They’re both made out of plastic and harmful to children.

What is the difference between a boomerang and an orphan's dad?

The boomerang comes back.

What do you call a Russian man with three balls?

'Whodya nikabollokov'

What's the difference between what Bill Cosby did and what OJ Simpson did? OJ Simpson's victims actually suffered and I actually feel bad for them (the boyfriend at least).

What do you call an ex eating Taco Bell?

Explosion.

What's the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky is when you tickle your girlfriend with a feather, perverted is when you use the whole bird.

Kid. What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?

Teacher. What?

Kid. Fruity pebbles with water.

Teacher. Why water?

Kid. Cause his dad never came back with the milk.

What is Forrest Gump’s email password?

1forrest1.

What do emo kids and bats have in common?

They both hang from trees.

What does a perverted frog say?

"Rubbit."

What do you call being run over by Michael Jackson?

Being hit by... Being struck by... A smooth criminal.

What do you do when you see a kid alone? You beat them up and say, "It was self-defense!"

What's the difference between orphans and apples?

Apples get picked.

What’s the difference between you and Jesus? We know who Jesus’s dad was.

What’s red and very rare?

A baby in a blender.

What did Stephen Hawking say when he died?

I'm logging out.

What do rats like on their birthday? Mice cream and cake.

What did one fish say to the other?

Keep your mouth shut and you'll never get caught.

What do you call a mouse that doesn't like being known about?

Anonymouse.

What do terrorists do on 9/11? They have a game of Jenga.