What did the deaf, dumb, and blind kid get for Christmas?
Answer: cancer.
Whats Jokes
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument?
A trombone.
What's the difference between a snowman and a snowgirl?
Snowballs.
What did one wall say to the other wall?
Meet you at the corner!
What do you call a drivable Hamburger?
What?
A Hamborgini.
What do you call a gay dinosaur? Megasoreass.
What do you call a kid having a seizure on a dance floor? An improvement.
What’s black and rings the doorbell?
Stevie Wonder answering the iron.
What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with boobs?
One's a crusty bus station and one's a busty crustacean.
What has 5 legs, 3 arms, and 7 feet?
The finish line at the marathon bombing.
What's long, hard, and has cum in it?
A cuCUMber.
What’s weaker than a daffodil? Mundy’s ankles.
Jim walks into a bar and asks for a shot of vodka. He then says to the barkeep, "Who's the toughest guy in here?"
The barkeep points to a man at the pool table. Jim then knocked him out and paid for the shot and left. He did this every Friday for 2 months. Finally, the barkeep is pissed because Jim keeps knocking out all of his customers. He then orders a gorilla and puts him in the bathroom.
Jim walks into the bar and gets another shot of vodka. He asks again, "Who's the toughest guy in here tonight?" The bartender points to the bathroom and says he's in there. Jim walks into the bathroom and everyone in the bar can hear yelling and screaming. The bartender asks, "What happened in there?" Jim smiles and says, "I don't know who that was, but when he wakes up tell him I put his fur jacket in the toilet."
One day, a snail got robbed by two turtles. Once the cops arrived and asked what had happened, the snail said, "I don't know, it all happened too fast!"
What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck.
What do French ducks say?
Quoi quoi.
What lives on the forest floor?
Forest Gump.
What is more time-consuming than children?
Waiting for your wife to go into labor!
What’s Steven Hawking's fav[orite] food?
WiFi chips or his shoulder?
What's black and white and red all over?
A massacre at a funeral.