Whats jokes
What's red, 6 inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry when I feed it to her?
Her miscarriage.
What do you call a dick playing badminton?
A shuttlecock.
What was the winning play at the leper football game?
A hand off up the middle.
What do you call a band made of cheese?
Grate That!
What would a clock look like with no numbers?
Timeless!
What do you call a clever clock?
Clockwise.
What did the dick say to the asshole?
You need another dick.
Whats the difference between NASA and religion
NASA takes you through space Religion takes you through two towers
What do you call a five year old with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.
What's the difference between a baby and a sandwich?
I don't f**k a sandwich before I eat it.
What kind of pictures do turtles take?
Shelfies.
What was Jim Jones' favorite drink?
Killer Kool-Aid.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Licka-lotta-puss.
What's a rapist's favorite scale?
C Minor.
Man says, "What's Ligma?"
Woman says, "Ligma balls!"
Baby says nothing, she transgender.
Wanna hear a joke?
Yeah.
...
What's the joke?
I said it already!
What does the blind, deaf child get for Christmas?
Cancer.
What's the difference between a rabbi and a priest? One cuts them off and one sucks them off.
What’s the hardest part of a veggie to eat?
The wheelchair.
Q: A mom had 5 children: January, February, March, April. What is the name of the fifth child?
A: What.