Whats jokes
What did Mother Mary say when God farted? Jesus Christ, you stink!
There was this kid who was going to take a girl to the dance. He had fancy clothes, fancy shoes, etc. Finally, the day of the dance came. He happily drove over to the girl's house. When he got there, he said to her father, "thank you for this moment, have a great night".
At the dance, the girl asks the boy, "can I have some food?" He gladly replies "yes" and walks over to the food trucks, only to see a huge line. So he waits in line for like 30 minutes. He comes back to the girl, and she says, "thank you so much, I really needed something to eat". Then she asks for some sweets and a soda. Again the boy waits in line for about 30-45 minutes. Then he comes back, and she says, "thank you SOOOO much". Then she says she has one more request. The boy, (now clearly agitated) says, "what is it?" She says, can I have some punch? SO the boy walks over to the punch table, but to his surprise, there was no punch line.
What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?
Time to get a new fence!
What brakes but never falls, and what falls but never brakes?
Answer: Night falls and dawn brakes.
What's the difference between a fish and a guitar?
You can tuna guitar, but you can't tuna fish!
What did the plate say to the other plate? Lunch is on me! đ
What's the difference between dead babies and a Ferrari?
I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.
What do you call a depressed emo? Dead.
Whatâs a Mexicanâs favorite sport?
Cross-country.
What's the difference between having sex with my girlfriend and a baby?
I don't have a girlfriend.
What's the difference between 13 dead babies and a skeleton?
There aren't any, there's 13 skeletons in my closet.
Son: âMom, is there a thing called «friendship» between a man and a woman?â
Mother: âNo Son, unless if heâs gay.â
Son: âSo your friend is gay?â
Mother with herself: «How did he see me with michael omg if my husband discovered my cheating he will kill me»
Mother: âMmm.. Yes.â
Father loudly: âYES!!!â
Mother: âWhat in the hell? Are you gay?â
Father with himself: «Am i an idiot why did i yell?! if she discovered Iâm gay and her son was made by Paulâs semens she will kill me»
Father: âNo what are saying? Iâm just talking with myself.â
*A few hours later*
Mother: âI will go to visit my mother.â
Father: âMe too I will go to visit my mother.â
Son: âNot me too I will go to stud with my friends.â
The mother and the father goes to michaelâs house and they found their son playing with Michael and Paul is recording them and saying: «thatâs why I love you my actual son oh only if your mother knows».
*The End* :D
What do you get when you cross a cat and a dinosaur? A cat-astrophe!
What did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side. đđđ
What did the two oceans say to each other?
Nothing. They just waved.
What do cows eat for breakfast?? Steer cereal.
I asked my friend what their serial number was... He said "Cheerios."
What do you call a fish that has a dick?
Moby Dickkkkk!
What feature does an orphan's phone not have?
A home button.
What's fat and wanks over his mom?
Guy Sheppard.