Whats jokes
What's the difference between you and Jesus? Your parents remember Jesus's birth date.
What's one thing gay people can't draw?
A straight line.
*Hears the news about Sandy Hook* Person 1: "God, I can only imagine what was going through those kids' heads in the last moments of their lives..."
Person 2: "Probably Bullets."
Person 1: "OMG!! Can you even think of what their parents are going through?!"
Person 2: "Probably Coffin Brochures."
Person 1: "...."
Person 2: "It's called dark humor. Dark humor is like food, not everyone gets it."
What do you call it when you get away with masturbating in the shower?
You got off clean.
What was the nickname for the knight who ruled the fort?
"Fortnite"
What do you call a bear without an ear?
B.
What's the difference between a pile of babies and a Porsche?
I don't have a Porsche in my garage.
What's worse than finding 10 babies in 10 dumpsters?
Finding 1 baby in 10 dumpsters.
What’s my favorite Islamic Holiday... 9/11.
What do you call a cow with no legs? (Ground Beef!) No, a cow! The absence of legs does not change the fact that the species is still a cow!
What do you call a DOG with no legs? (A dog?) It doesn't matter what you call it, as it's never going to come.
What's the difference between a feminist and a pig?
There isn't one; they are both the same thing.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire? Hot wheels!
What do you call a fat bitch that eats cum from used condoms? Your mom!
Me and Jesus are really close; he even turns the light on for me when I go pee in the middle of the night. Well, that is what I thought until the fridge was wet.
What do you call a stalker stalking himself? A narcissist.
What's the difference between a dump truck of dead babies and a Ferrari?
I don't own a Ferrari.
What did the kid with Down syndrome say to his friend?
Nothing, he had no friends.
What did the chicken say to the turkey?
Nothing, he chickened out!
What do you call a cow with a twitch?
Beef jerky.
Sailors are coming onto the boardwalk and are met by Colonel Sanders. He asks them, "What is your occupation?" They respond, "We are seamen." So he says, "Well, you better wash up 'cause I'm finger lickin' good!"