Wear jokes

What does a cloud wear in a storm?

Thunderwear.

When I wear all black, I'm not emo. I'm a rainbow, 'cause I'm wearing all the colors. #Science

Why does fireman wear red suspenders?

To hold his pants up.

This is not a joke. Have you ever thought about it? You’re an emo while wearing black. So what if you are black? Does that mean you’re an emo because you are black and emos wear black? ;)

A man was on the street and went up to a kid wearing rags. The man asked, "Hey, are you an orphan?"

The kid said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"

The man said, "Your parents."

Wears pink.

I’m still wearing the smile you gave me last week :)

What did the undershirt say to the T-shirt when they were fighting?

"If you don't shut up right now, you're gonna lose your shirt!!!"

Get it?

Like, if you hate wearing a mask.

Every time I'm out in public, and I see someone without their mask, I always feel like there is something extra special about them. Then I realize that I can see all their face!

True story by the way.

How do people with hydrocephalus wear standard-size helmets?

Kid: Dad, where do you work?

Dad: I.C.U.P.

Kid: HAHAHAH!!!! See you pee.

Why do Mexicans wear pointed boots?

So they can climb a fence easier.

You should wear binoculars when calculating. It helps divide.

When your girlfriend picks you up and decides to prank you by not wearing pants to a seafood restaurant:

Did you get seafood without me? It smells like fish.

Why can't lesbians wear makeup while on a diet?

Because they can't eat Jenny Craig while Mary Kay is sitting on their face.

Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to school? Because her students were so bright.

What’s worse than banging your sister?

Having to wear your dad’s wedding ring.

Why did the rapper wear a watch to the studio?

Because it was all about the TIMING.

This dude is so fat, wearing the same damn clothes every day. Every time he turns around, it's his graduation day. He forgot to put a boomerang on his pants because they don't even fit anymore. Last time I saw him coming down the street, it was in a bucket of Popeye's chicken, extra crispy.

My boyfriend always likes when I wear my fishnet sleeves. He says it looks great on me, but he doesn’t know that my skin is covered with scars... no one does. No one questions why I wear them everyday. I hope it stays like that because I can’t deal with my mom finding out that I still hurt myself.