What's the best part of not wearing a condom when I'm with my girlfriend? My mom went through menopause.
Why do women wear makeup and perfume?
Because they're ugly and smell bad.
POV: You are a passenger on September 11th, 2001, and you see the pilots wearing a Muslim turban.
What do you call a Barbie doll that’s wearing scrubs?
A plastic surgeon. 😷
My mate caught me sniffing his disabled sister's knickers the other day. It wouldn't have been so bad, but she was wearing them at the time. It made the rest of the funeral so awkward.
Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to school? Because her students were so bright.
What do you call a man wearing a rug on his head? Matt.
What’s worse than banging your sister?
Having to wear your dad’s wedding ring.
Why did the rapper wear a watch to the studio?
Because it was all about the TIMING.
How do people with hydrocephalus wear standard-size helmets?
Kid: Dad, where do you work?
Dad: I.C.U.P.
Kid: HAHAHAH!!!! See you pee.
What does a cloud wear in a storm?
Thunderwear.
Wears pink.
I’m still wearing the smile you gave me last week :)
What did the undershirt say to the T-shirt when they were fighting?
"If you don't shut up right now, you're gonna lose your shirt!!!"
Get it?
Like, if you hate wearing a mask.
Every time I'm out in public, and I see someone without their mask, I always feel like there is something extra special about them. Then I realize that I can see all their face!
True story by the way.
Why do Mexicans wear pointed boots?
So they can climb a fence easier.
When I wear all black, I'm not emo. I'm a rainbow, 'cause I'm wearing all the colors. #Science
Why does fireman wear red suspenders?
To hold his pants up.
This is not a joke. Have you ever thought about it? You’re an emo while wearing black. So what if you are black? Does that mean you’re an emo because you are black and emos wear black? ;)
