Weapon jokes

So, a man walks past a gun store and sees all the guns are half price. Then the man says, "Wow, school supplies are low this week."

If Will Smith had a revolver and said, "Who fucked my wife?" Chris Rock would say, "You don't have enough bullets, mate."

Are you a knife?

Because I want to deep throat you.

What is white, then red, and is very fast?

My chainsaw blade.

What do you call a retard with AK special forces?

Are you a gun because I want to live with you?

I gave a gun to a blind person and told them it was a hair dryer.

What's pink, red, and silver and bumps into walls?

A baby with forks in its eyes.

Billy: Dad, I was shot by a sniper!

Dad: Uh...

*hides his rifle*

What does a baby and a grenade have in common?

They both make a noise when you throw them.

Please don't get mad, it's a joke.

What's the difference between a bullet and a police officer? At least when a bullet kills someone, it's fired.

How do you kill a retard?

Give them a knife and say, "Who's special?"

What do you call a terrorist swimming?

A bath bomb!

What do you do when you see a lady in a wheelchair?

You grab a stick and put it through the wheelchair and call her nunchucks.

What do you call a paralyzed kid with a gun?

Special Forces.

What do you call a terrorist in a bathtub?

Bathbomb.

What do you call a AK-47 that lost 1 point?

An AK-46.

I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a blow dryer.

One day I was passing a blind man and I gave him a gun and told him it was a blow dryer.

Next day I went for another walk and saw his grave.

I had the WORST day ever. My ex was sent to the hospital from a gun, and I got my hunting license removed.