Weapon jokes
"Ching chong, drop the bomb!"
What do you call an autistic person with a driver's license?
A LETHAL WEAPON!
What do you call a group of special ed kids with guns? Special forces.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the car.
Why do most clips for automatic weapons have 32 bullets?
That's usually how many kids are in a classroom.
Afgans looking at the GBU-43/B Massive Ordnance Air Blast Bomb like
Are you a bullet? Because you go straight through my head.
Why are the best used guns from France?
Because they have never been fired and they have only been dropped once.
What did the knife say to the other knife?
"Knife to meet you."
Q. What do you call a gun that rapes someone?
A. An assault rifle.
What's a knife's favorite person?
The victim.
Commander: "Fire a warning shot."
Soldier: "Sir, this is a M32 grenade launcher."
Commander: "Potato, potato, just fire."
Soldier: *fires M32 grenade launcher near a pre-school*
Commander: "They're trying to run, TAKE THEM DOWN!"
What do you do when you finish a magazine at the hospital?
Reload and keep shooting.
What do you call a suicide bomber in a wheelchair?
An RCXD (remote control explosive).
Hey, 2nd Amendmenters! Wanna know what gun Jesus used during his time?
What?
A nail gun!
Bomb.
Jason: Did you hear about the storm-trooper who attempted suicide?
Dave: No.
Jason: Well, he hit his first target.
Aboriginals around for 50,000 years invented the spear.
I asked a man if I was the fastest gun in the west. He said my 17 wasn't good enough. After that, a lot of lead went into his head.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He lost a water gun fight.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Answer: Special forces.