Weapon jokes
I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a hairdryer.
When you're sitting in class and the quiet kid yells, "Lovely day, isn't it?" ... and you see a Glock shape in his pocket.
Once, there was a man that was coming to my house and peeing in my yard. Then the man came back to my house and flopped his penis everywhere and peed at the same time, and it went all over my face.
So the next day, he came back, and I got my BB gun and shot a metal BB into his peepee.
This didn't actually happen.
Me: Stepping on a scale to weigh myself.
Everyone else in the minefield...
What's the difference between an air blower and Little Boy?
When the air blower blew, it did not wipe out Hiroshima.
What does a knife have but not my life...
A point.
How I Punch my Brother: Wooden Sword.
How he is telling Dad: Diamond Sword.
How hard my Dad is gonna punch me: Warden Punch.
I don’t know why I’m in jail. So, basically, I was at a gun range, and we were supposed to hit the targets, even though I hit it.
Teacher: What month is it?
Quiet kid: AUG-ust.
Classroom: Visible concern.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun? Special forces.
What do you do when you hear your wife squirming around in the back yard?
Reload... chhchhhh.
It was just a big hunter killer drone.
How do you make epileptic kids dance?
Throw a flash bang in their room.
What do a baby and a grenade have in common? They both make loud noises when thrown.
What do you call an abo with a shotgun?
Sir.
I threw a boomerang a few years ago. I now live in constant fear.
Q: What comes before 47?
A: AK
Why did everyone dislike Little Johnny at school?
'Cause he pierced everyone's livers with a .357 magnum.
What's a gun's favorite type of literature?
Magazine.
What's the POINT in stabbing people?
HAHAHA