Weapon jokes

What do you get if you cross an avocado and a Glock?

Glockamole.

When the quiet kid gets angry and the sped kid sees your hiding spot.

Bing, bang, boom!

Why are there 30 bullets in one clip?

Because that's the average classroom size.

One day I threw a boomerang...

Now I live in constant fear.

Here’s another joke my friend told me.

What did the school shooter do when the librarian told him to be quiet? Pulled out a silencer.

What do you call a group of sped kids with AK-47s?

Special forces.

"Sticks and stones break my bones."

A crowbar does it so much quicker.

I was playing laser tag with my ex, but I (wink) didn't realize I had a real gun.

I gave a blind kid a hand grenade and told him it's a beyblade.

Today I gave a blind guy a gun and told him it was a hair dryer. Since I have no fingerprints, the police said it was suicide. I guess you can say I took care of him!

What do you call an army of autistic people with guns?

Special forces.

Teacher: Alright kids. 50, 49, 48, 47. What comes before 47?

Kid: AK!

Everyone else: 🚪 🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏽🏃🏿🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏽🏃🏿🏃🏿🏃🏿‍♀️ 🎒 🏃🏻

Babies are like airstrikes; they get aborted.

If you throw a nun, is it called a... Nunchuck???

"Ching chong, drop the bomb!"

What do you do when you hear your wife squirming around in the back yard?

Reload... chhchhhh.

I bought a silencer for my gun, but I don't think it works.

My victims still scream.

A news headline read: "A toddler has shot a person every week in the US for two years straight."

He was in the infantry.

Women are like grenades: you pull the ring and BOOM, the house is gone!

What is your arm's favorite military branch? The army.