Ok so I know this is not a joke but I wanted to take some time to say if you have autism your are still amazing you are lovely in every way and if people bully you don't lisn because they are wrong you are cute and I know how it feels I have ADHD and I get bullied a lot but I don't let that get to me because I know what they are saying is wrong and not true people with autism stay strong you got this I will be your friend by heart Evan if it's not by person
Why is an orpan favourite movie 🍿 spider man no way home
Why can orphans never walk home? because theres no way to go
Q: How are Asians like a box of chocolates?
A: Either way they'll kill your dog.
Imagine the only way you can get laid is if you force it😂loser
What's bigger than the Milky Way?
Michael Jackson's nose
What is the fastest way to spread a rumor? Telephone? NO. Television? No. How then? Tell A Woman
I would kiss ur lips but your legs are blocking the way.
If you know u know 😏😏
-a beautiful woman is on the ledge of a bridge about to commit suicide-
a homeless man walks by her and says "what are you doing?"
she says "im going to jump"
the homeless man says "if youre going to kill yourself, do you wanna have sex with me first?"
the woman replies "no way creep! never that!"
the homeless man doesn't seem bothered and says
"thats fine, I'll just wait til you're at the bottom"
when you ask for plastic surgery they said 'we could not fix you but the only way is to wear a mask to fix your ugly face'
the way to stop school shootings is to give children a rpg
When you forget the pinata at the birthday party. The kids: "Aww man." But the emo kid just hung himself. Kids: "Yaaaaayyy." Parents: "Adjust, improvise, overcome, that is the way."
Me : “You guys wanna know a cool fact?” Friend 1 : “Yeah” Friend 2 : “Yea” Me : “Japan is RIGHT that way. If we swim all night...we’ll be able to get to Japan.” Friend 3 : “I love anime.” Friend 1 & 2 : “Nononononononononono!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Me : *Laughs at Friend 3*
It's way too soon for Kobe jokes. They never land well.
So a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex, when he gets to the bar he brags about the different sex positions they used and one of the guys says "oh did you do head" and he responded with no I couldn't find the head
What is Michael Jackson's favorite candy bar? Milk-hee-hee way
What excuse can you use if you find out your date is a rape victim and you don't want the baggage?
Say you've parked your car in a bad spot, and are just going move it, then move your car all the way back to your home address
Never compare an orphan to an Apple because the Appel all ways gets pick.
Jon and Amanpreet were in a mental institution. This place had an annual contest picking two of the best patients and gives them two questions. If they got them correct, they’re deemed cured and free to go.
Jon was called into the doctor’s office first and asked if he understood that he’d be free if he answered the questions correctly. The doctor said, „Jon, what would happen if I poked out one of your eyes?“ Jon said, „I’d be half blind.“ „That’s correct. What if I poked out both eyes?“ „I’d be completely blind.“ The doctor stood up, shook Jon’s hand, and told him he was free.
On Jon’s way out, as the doctor filled out the paperwork, Jon mentioned the exam to Amanpreet. He told him what questions were going to be asked and gave him the answers. So Amanpreet came in. The doctor went thru the formalities and asked, „What would happen if I cut off one ear?“ Amanpreet, remembering what Jon had said was the correct answer said, „I’d be half blind.“ The doctor looked a little puzzled, but went on. „What if I cut off the other ear?“ „I’d be completely blind,“ Amanpreet answered. „Amanpreet, can you explain how you’d be *blind*?“ „My hat would fall down over my eyes.“
Hey, I met you like way way back, just like your hairline.
