There were people having sex when it started sinking. Legend tells when you go near the ship you can see semin and if you listen close enough you'll hear them moaning.
Now that's a hell of a ghost story.
Yo Father. Don't use the baptism bath. I cleaned my anul plug in there.
What?
The holy water gets all the ass of. Don't mind the white stuff. *clears throat*
You know how divers jump off a cliff and land in the water well...
Emos do that too, but when they jump, they don't land in the water.
People were scared of the alligator because it ate everyone, so they called for the water god Aquarius.
He said "Sea ya later, alligator!" and he drowned.
Orphans always dip their Oreos in water, hoping their dad comes back with the milk.
They say Jesus walked on water.
That's nothing. Stephen Hawking ran on batteries.
Toaster + Bath = The ultimate bath bomb!
According to scientists, there have been a discovery of water on mars. Mars-1 Africa-0
do you know wut fortnite before season 2 chapter 3/ they put the foundation/the rock in the water wher aliens were that season
Why are midgets constantly thirsty?
They can't reach the drinking fountains.
A toddler, was giving her daddy a tea party She brought him a little cup of "tea" which was just water, of course. After several cups of tea , her Mom came home, Dad made her wait in the living room to watch his little Princess bring him a cup of tea, because it was, "Just the cutest thing!" Mom waited, and sure enough, here she come down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy. She watches him drink it up and then says, "You know the only place she can reach water, is the toilet!
What do you call a swimming terrorist?
A bath bomb.
What would happen if a dam broke when you are on it?
You would be dam unlucky.
The pastor sees little Johnny sitting on the church steps. Little Johnny is fixated on something. The pastor looks closer and sees that Johnny is stirring up something in an old coffee can. He says, "What you got there little Johnny?"
"This here is turpentine, the most POWERFUL liquid in the world!", says Johnny.
The pastor shakes his head, sits down next to Johnny, and says, "Now you know that's not true, son. Holy water is the most powerful liquid in the world. One drop of holy water on a pregnant woman's stomach and the next morning she'll pass a baby boy."
Little Johnny says, "Well that may be true, but one drop of this on a cat's ass and he'll pass a motorcycle!"
I got caught peeing in the pool.
The lifeguard blew his whistle so hard I nearly fell in!
So skinny you have to run around in the shower to get wet.
Kid. What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?
Teacher. What?
Kid. Fruity pebbles with water.
Teacher. Why water?
Kid. Cause his dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a bottle of water flying over Africa?
A UFO.
Don't you just hate when you have to eat cereal with water because your dad won't bring the fucking milk? Cause same.
1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon.
3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.”
4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
5. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river.
6. Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils.
7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope.
8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves.
9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.
10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee.
11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, “mini-soda”).
12. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
13. Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff.
14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat.
15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball.
16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
17. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.
