Want jokes

The orphan wanted to call home sick, but there was no one.

The orphan went to school to have food, but there was no money in his account.

Why can't orphans get 5 stars in GTA?

Because they're not wanted.

Today I went to get a sub, and they asked me if I wanted all vegetables. I said no, leave some for the rest of the customers.

I swear bro, this time I don't want any jokes on 9/11. Like people actually died, like that shit is just plane wrong. 💀

Chump obviously wants to divorce Melania and marry Pootin, lmfao.

Why did the orphan cheat on his girlfriend with a guy?

Because he wanted someone to call "Mommy" and "Daddy."

Why do orphans watch "The Nightmare Before Christmas"?

Answer: Oogie Boogie is ugly, so they want to be ugly.

I'm not transphobic. I just want transparency...

Why do orphans want to be criminals?

I wanted to fall off a cliff, sadly, there aren't any cliffs near my house.

You're adopted, do you want to know why? Because you're so ugly.

The UK is a joke. I want to leave ASAP.

"I can lose 10 ugly pounds anytime I want -- I'll just cut off my head!"

Do you use humor to make light of your emotional eating and your weight? Make jokes about overeating and being fat as a way of getting along with other people? I was a Grand Champion at it.

What do you call a person with no arms and legs?

You can call him whatever you want; he's not coming.

Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?

Because he wanted to go to high school.

What is the difference between an orphan and a bandit?

One's wanted.

Have a child you don't want? Just drop them off at a school they don't know and drive away.

I wanted to hire a butler for my new mansion in downtown LA. As he arrived, he introduced himself and I discovered it was Ghostionel Pessi.

I asked him why is he working as a butler? He told me that “a big game is coming up so he needs to refine his bottleling skills.” DAMN PESSI!

When I was 11, my mom came home from the bar super drunk that night, and I just wanted to know if they knew where the cat was because I heard a noise. We had a loooooooong talk the next morning.

Are you adopted?

No.

I mean, who would want you?