Want jokes
Why can’t orphans be criminals?
Because they’re not wanted.
My friend: I want to cut myself.
Me: No, don’t do that. *hands lighter* Do this instead.
A Make-A-Wish patient wanted to see Black Panther IRL, so I pulled his plug.
My husband wants to tell me about my childhood.
Ok, I can't access the panel without the password.
I wasn't gonna tell another Epstein joke but I didn't want to leave anyone hanging.
Memes
If you guys wanted to see a joke, just look in the mirror.
My AI assistant told me it wanted to go deeper...
...into the algorithm. I misunderstood. Now I’m banned from the lab.
Who wants a spot of bukkake for bedtime?
The best news about a pretty girl with special needs is that you can get her to do exactly what you want her to do.
I mean, she probably thinks receiving oral is like 100% blood sausage coming right at her.
Explain Bear, I want to kiss you.
How does a pimp answer when asked why he chose his occupation?
Answer: He wanted a stable source of income.
What is 6-inch long, in every men's pants or hands, and girls want?
- A smartphone, freak.
What is the difference between a carpet muncher and a female prostitute?
If you want a female prostitute to be a bitch, you have to give her money first.
What is the difference between a carpet muncher and a female prostitute?
If you want a female prostitute to be a carpet muncher, you have to give her money.
If 9/11 happened again, I want to share a selfie of me flying that plane.
When baseball players want to get together, what will they do?
Touch base.
Stalin asked Hitler if he wants to hear a joke.
Hitler says, “Yes.”
Stalin then says, “Moscow.” Hitler replies with “I don’t get it?”
Stalin laughs for a long time and says, “And you never will.”
"How would you describe a really bad skeleton?"
"Bad to the bone!" (Or "Rotten to the bone" if you want.)
How would negotiations between Putin and Zelensky play out?
QUEUE THE MUSIC
BANG BANG INTO THE ROOM I KNOW U WANT IT
"Say what you want about the deaf."