Confucius say, man who go to sleep with itchy bum, wake up with smelly finger.
Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to.
Unless you are in prison
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Sometimes I just wake up in the morning and think damn better luck next time
Why make a joke when i wake up and look at myelf?
GO ON THE QUINTILLIONAIRE MORNING ROUTINE NOW!
1. Wake up 2. Take a shit 3. Eat 4. Get out of bed 5. Have breakfast
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
How do you wake up lady gaga? Poker Face.
Don’t cry when you attend my funeral, I was dead long ago so why cry now?
Sans:Zzzzzzzz Papyrus:SANS WAKE UP!! Sans:What is it dude? Papyrus:A human has fallen from the surface world! Sans:And you gotta BONE to pick with 'em??
Me and my grandpa went on a road trip and he died that was the last thing we did together and I will never forget his last words “WAKE UP YOU DUMBASS”
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
How do you get an orphan to go to sleep?
Tell them there parent are waiting when the wake up.
Why do orphans not care about sleep, because they have no one to wake up to
If chickens wake up when the Rooster crows, then when do ducks wake?
At the quack of dawn.
A 98 year old man goes to bed on a one layer bed- He wakes up under it...
he never has a bad day
because he always wake’s up on both sides on the bed
man: hi doc, i have a problem. i take a shit at 6:00am every morning. doc: whats wrong with that. man: i dont wake up until 8:00am
👧👧👧 👧 Why do girls rub their eyes after they wake up in the morning ? because they don't have balls to scratch
A man wakes up in the hospital and says, "Doctor! Doctor! I can't feel my legs!" "of course," the doctor says. "I amputated your arms"
