Vs jokes
What's the similarities between the New York Jets and the World Trade Center?
They both fall in September.
What's the difference between my arm and legs? Nothing. I slit both of them.
What is the difference between an orphan and a watermelon?
One of them is picked.
What is the difference between a feminist and a gorilla? One of them is fat and hairy, while the other one has a functional brain (the gorilla, of course).
What is the difference between an Apple and an orphan?
The apples get picked.
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris?
My boner had better structural support than the Twin Towers.
"It's Sunday evening!"
"No. It's Monday eve."
What's the difference between normal sex and anal sex?
One makes your whole day and one makes your hole weak.
What can an Olympic runner do that Hitler can't?
Finish a race.
What’s the difference between broccoli and little girls?
I don’t like the taste of broccoli.
My wife (or husband) told me to get six cans of Sprite from the grocery store.
I had just realized when I got home that I had picked up 7-Up.
What's the difference between an orphan and a Chinese kid?
The Chinese kid has a home.
Give a man a match, he'll be warm for hours.
Light the man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
What do you call a person that [proudly] knows only one language? A bloody seppo.
What do you call a person that speaks five languages? A Euro waiter.
How are an orphan and baseball different from each other?
A baseball game has a home run.
Russians think they are tougher than Americans. Here are some reasons for the Russians out here reading this:
1. USA was NEVER invaded!
2. USA never commits as many war crimes as Russia does!
3. USA made the first nuclear weapon so yeah shove that up your ass, Russians!
4. Our soldiers don’t rape kids.
5. We have more allies than you.
6. We are smaller but stronger.
7. Random civilians in the USA have stronger guns than Russian military does!
Why drink water and not bleach?
How are baseball and an orphan different?
A baseball game you can do a home run.
Bro, yo mama so fat Thanos had to clap her out of existence.