Virus jokes

What if your Corona test is neutral?

COVID-19 is like pasta.

Asians invented it, Italians spread it.

AIDS?

Just accidentally emailed a porn link to a co-worker... So I emailed ten other co-workers the link and called it a virus.

The warden gave them a choice of three ways to die: to be shot, to be hung, or to be injected with the AIDS virus for a slow death.

So the German said, "Shoot me right in the head." Boom, he was dead instantly.

Then the Italian said, "Just hang me." Snap, he was dead.

Then the Irishman said, "Give me some of that AIDS stuff." They gave him the shot, and the Irishman fell down laughing. The guards looked at each other and wondered what was wrong with this guy.

Then the Irishman said, "Give me another one of those shots," so the guards did. Now he was laughing so hard, tears rolled from his eyes and he doubled over.

Finally, the warden said, "What is wrong with you?"

The Irishman replied, "You guys are so stupid... I'm wearing a condom!"

Snow White and the six Dwarfs, Sneezy was caught by covid-19 quarantine!

Chuck Norris has come in contact with Covid.

Covid is now in a 14-day quarantine.

The CCP should be pleased. COVID is the longest thing to have ever been made in China.

Last year, I got kicked out of the Hospital for telling COVID patients to stay positive!

I only seem to get sick on weekdays. I must have a weekend immune system.

Is it OK to tell a Covid patient to stay positive?

Why can’t Chinese people play baseball? Because they ate the bat.

If you don’t get it, a Chinese woman ate a bat and she got the coronavirus (I think).

What's the difference between COVID and 9/11?

I've never heard of someone dying in a car accident, and the media blaming it on 9/11.

Covid be like, "I'm going to take your breath away."

China wants their name on everything but the m.f. virus.

Why did Steven Hawkins die?

Because he got a virus.

A guy with AIDS went into the doctor's room unusually happy. You could even say he was HIV positive.

Have you ever heard about the new virus in China? It's called Hupun.

Hupun DEEZ NUTS!

My mom asked my doctor, "Why is my unvaccinated baby crying?"

The doctor replied, "He's going through a midlife crisis."

Time heals all wounds.

Unless you have AIDS, when time kills you slowly and painfully.