What’s the worst song to play in front of a vegetable? “James Brown - Get on Up”
What’s the worst song to play in front of a handicapped kid? “Van Halen - Jump”
What's the worst song to play in front of a black man in Minneapolis? “I Can't Breathe - Juice Wrld”
A policeman walks up to a van with two priests and says, "We're looking for two child molesters."
The priests both look at each other for a moment and then say, "Okay, we'll do it."
Are you a white van? Because I would love to put children in you.
What's a paedophile's favorite footwear?
White Vans.
What song do you play at an emo kid's funeral?
Van Halen's "Jump."
Kid: "Mom, what happened to Jim?"
Mom: "He got inside a white van."
I heard there was a kidnapping.
Don't worry, he woke up in the back of a van.
It was his father's friend who was a priest.
He was just bringing him to church.
How many times does 50 fit into 9?
Get in a van and find out!
If there are 4 Mexicans in a van, which of them is driving?
None of them. Immigration service is.
The sun is out, and the pedo vans are out.
Parents, keep your kids away from ice cream vans. Once they hear the sound, you'll never see your kids again!
Why can an orphan never get picked up?
Because the white van did not come that day. HAHA BIG LOL
Friend: Why did you touch me?
Me: That guy in the corner with no hair, glasses, really nice, white button up shirt, that drives a white van slow by school zones told me to and he would give me hard candy.
Which legendary Dutch wanderer slept for twenty years, except when he got up to pee?
Rip Van Tinkle.
What do you call a Jedi teacher who lives in a forest?
Obi-Wan Canopy
Imagine a white van. Now imagine a white guy in the driver seat with a sombrero on and his arm out the window, and on the side of the van it says "Free Candy." But there's blood all over the van and a dead clown in the back.
Why is it wrong to drive around in a van offering children candy?
Because you’ll have more success if you give out video games!
What's a kidnapper's favorite shoe? White vans.
Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun GET IN THE VAN!!
I am the ice cream man running over fat kids with my van. If you touch my van, I’ll smack you in the face with a frying pan. If you steal ice cream, I’ll shoot you in the face with a fudge machine.
What do you call a cow in a moving van?
A: A mooving cow.
