TV jokes
Yo mama's so fat, when she walked by the TV when I was watching a show, I waited, and when she finally passed by, Netflix said suggestions: Hulu, and Peacock.
British tv: 馃枼
Italian tv: 馃摵
Why can't orphans play baseball? They don鈥檛 know where home is.
I made a website for orphans, but it doesn't have a home page.
Doctor: I鈥檓 going to have to turn you away. Orphan: But why? Doctor: Because I鈥檓 a family doctor.
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Cause they come back.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it鈥檚 like to be wanted.
Girls are like rocks; the flat ones get skipped.
What鈥檚 an orphan鈥檚 least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
If you hit an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
If you hit an orphan with a car, at least you don't have to tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
What does an orphan call a family photo? A selfie.
Why was the orphan a big success? Cause people say go big or go home, he only had one option.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It鈥檚 not like they can tell their parents.
What鈥檚 an orphan鈥檚 least favorite store? Home Depot.
What do orphans and blind kids have in common? They can鈥檛 see their parents.
Why can't orphans hear about ancient Egypt? Because they don鈥檛 know what a mummy is.
Why are orphans bad at poker? Because they don't know what a full house is.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
My girlfriend left a note on the TV saying, "This isn't working!" I don't know what she's talking about, the TV works perfectly fine.
What are emos' favorite TV show theme song?
Beyblade, Beyblade, let it rip!
While I was waiting for your mum to waddle past, I missed a whole season of my TV show!
Why do people hate Velma now?
Because she joined the Dark Side.
TV Darth Vader: "I'm your father!"
Orphans: "Yea."
I woke up one night and it was really dark in my room. Then my TV started to float out the window. I said, "Drop it, nig-"
Yo mama so fat, when she passed by the TV, I missed a whole season of SpongeBob.
My orphan terrorist friend is on TV... I think he blew up.
What do orphans and TVs have in common?
At least one of them has a home.
The daughter of an incestuous pedophile goes into the living room where he is watching TV and asks him if she can borrow the car that evening.
"Sure honey! If you suck my dick!"
So she gets down on him but something is wrong. She pops her head up and says: "Dad! This tastes like shit!"
"Oh yeah, I forgot," says the father. "I already gave your brother the car for tonight."
One day my friend said: "I want tacos from Katie's, you?" and I said no thanks and she left. I never saw her again. Today I remember that I saw her name on TV as one of the victims of suicide, then I remember her and my motto: "If I'm dying, you're dying with me, you got no choice." I NEVER ate tacos from Katie's again.
Yo mama's so stupid, when thieves broke into her house and stole the TV, she chased after them shouting, "Wait, you forgot the remote!"
What's the worst TV series for orphans?
Family Guy.
My family was watching Home Alone 2, so whenever Kevin was at the top of the Twin Towers, I threw a paper airplane at the T.V.
What does Michael Jackson and a TV have in common? They both get turned on by kids.
What does a blind man crying and an unplugged TV have in common?
Nothing can be seen when they get turned on.
What TV series do orphans hate?
"House, M.D."