Travel Jokes

Why can orphans travel around so much?

A. They never get homesick

You mama is like train tracks she gets laid all around the country

I was born and raised in Newcastle. My grandfather used to tell me stories about Penaldo, a goblin from Portugal that travels to England when Newcastle is playing. He scores a tapin and then disappears until the next Newcastle game I still have nightmares that he’s in our stadium

I would like to complain about the new sushi restaurant at Gatwick Airport. Although there were large portions going round on the conveyor, they did taste a bit like luggage.

Me: opens the window to get some fresh air Everyone else on the plane:😟...😱

Mom:kid bring your toys and clothing to the car were going to Disney land

Kid:ok

Bring kid to the orphanages.

Time to go to New York to visit the twin towers.

They’re already getting closer

Q: Why are gay people never late for their flight? A: They get their shit packed the night before.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Give Kobe a plane ticket, he'll fly for the trip, but give Kobe a helicopter and he'll fly for the rest of his life.

I'M GOING TO HELL FOR THIS!!!

John Cabot was the first to explore the Coast of Labrador. After he left, he realized that he had forgotten something and had to go back to get whatever it was. This made him the first Labrador Retriever.

We dont got sluts in the south, we got NATS: Nasty Ass Traveling Sluts

me: i did just come home from africa and guess what i saw. friend: i dont know. me: a black market.

One day I was very happy, I managed to win lottery and receive free vacation trip to Saudi Arabia! Everything was going well until suddenly the FRAUD appeared! It was him, PRISTIANO PENALDO! He dived towards me and grabbed my lottery ticket. I asked him why is he doing this only for him to reply "I need trip to Saudi Arabia to statpad the PENS!" as he dived back through my window.

Shame on you for stealing my vacation and ruin my day! You are no longer my Idol Pristianooooo!