A lady asked if I heard about the mass shooting in Ohio. I said yes, my friend died there. She said Iām so sorry. I said yeah, I tried telling him the police had good aim. Worse than that, he just found out his sister was cheating on him.
*At A Funeral For Someone Who Jumped Off A Building* Victim's Mom: "I wonder what was the last thing that went through his head..."
Me: "Honestly... Probably his ass."
What's the emergency number, Jimmy?
Jimmy: 9/11!
Helicopter, helicopter, Kobe Bryant in my chopper, Sitting next to burning daughter, Lots of smoke and little laughter.
I hate when people make jokes about the Twin Towers.
My dad died on 9/11. He was a great pilot.
The orphan asked a genie to become Batman. Then he went home and saw his parents dead.
Knock, knock.
Orphan: Who's there?
Not your parents!
Why were 9/11 victims so mad?
They ordered three pepperoni pizzas, not two planes!
Guys we should stop making orphan jokes. Their parents will get mad... oh wait... Continue š
Why did the family move away?
Because they lost their son.
Why did the people in 9/11 not call 911? Because it would call the pilots.
What type of pizza did the 9/11 victims order? Two planes.
My girlfriend went to Tokyo, and she died in the tsunami.
Since I was sad, my friend told me, "Don't worry, there's plenty more in the ocean."
They say there is strength in numbers. Tell that to the people in the World Trade Center.
Why does this website have a home page? It's an orphan joke waiting to happen.
Every kid in a classroom is relevant, because if one of them gets shot, they will all be featured on the news.
"9/11 people" say that jet fuel cannot melt steel beams.
I wasn't close to my dad when he died.
Which was good, he died to a landmine.
What did the bones on the moon tell the astronaut?
The cow never made it.
We shouldn't joke about major tragedies. My dad died in 9/11, he was Saudi Arabia's best pilot.
