Touch

Touch Jokes

*WARNING* THIS WILL NEVER GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD - READ IF YOU DARE.....

What came first? The chicken or the egg?

Which came first? The colour orange or the fruit?

Who taught the first ever teacher?

If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected expected?

If you describe something as 'indescribable', then haven't you already described it?

In the word 'scent', is the silent letter the 's' or the 'ce'?

Why do your lips touch when they say the word 'seperate', but don't touch when you say the word 'together'?

How many photos do you think you could be in the background of?

The guy who discovered cow milk, what was he doing with that cow?

Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, "Oh no, its a cop"?

Is it possible to cry underwater?

If two left handers have an argument, who is right?

I warned you!! You just didn't listen.... :O

Once i was walking along the beach and there was a girl with no arms or legs there, i walked by and she said excuse me, will you touch me ive never been touched before, i was like okay so i touched her, i kept on walking along and there was the same girl, she said sir will you kiss me, i went alright so i went up and kissed her, i thought that was weird but anyway i kept walking along and there she was again, she said sir will you fuck me? I went okay so i picked her up and threw her in the ocean and went YOUR FUCKED NOW

How to give a good hand job?

Bop it Pull it Twist it Harder Better Faster Stronger You put your left hand in You put your left hand out You put your left hand in and shake it all about

None of you ever touch my penis

Yo mama so fat she didn't just cross the border she crossed ALL The borders

short version: yo mama so fat she touches every border

i like touching things that have been in space. i was super excited when i got to meet an astronaut

What can you break, even if you never pick it up or touch it? Answer: A promise

You know your doctor is gay when he ask u to touch your toes and then you feel a rub on your back and a tickle on your anus

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