Worst Jokes Ever
Kid 1: Guys, stop making 9/11 jokes. My dad died in 9/11.
Kid 2: Sorry, I didn't know.
Kid 1: He was the best fighter pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.
As a son, I like sports, and I watch sports with my mom. So one day, we were looking at football. My mom asked me who makes the most money. I said the quarterback.
My mom told me I'm going to get a quarterback as my new boyfriend, and it'll be your new stepfather. A week later, my mom went out. I came home, and I see my mom making out with a high school kid. I said, "What's going on?" My mom said, "Look, my new boyfriend and new stepfather is the high school quarterback." My mom said, "See, mission accomplished." I said, "Yeah, job well done."
I punched an orphan and told him to go back to his parents and tell them about it... Oh, wait.
So I told an orphan to slap themselves until they are wanted. I came back the next day to see them slapping themselves. Then I stopped them and told them to punch themselves.
The next day I saw a dead orphan.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
A-lick-a-lot-of-puss.
If you play the movie "Jaws" in reverse, it's a heartwarming story about a shark who gives arms and legs to disabled people.
Are you a highway? Because I wanna lay on you.
My father touched me yesterday. I called him a priest.
Your forehead is so big, you could roast meat on it.
I was gonna tell you a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort it.
What's an Emo's least favorite game?
Fruit Ninja.
If I make fun of orphans, they will cry to their parents.
Oh wait...
Why can't depressed people make depression jokes? Because they can't talk if they are dead.
What are Emo kids good at... hanging around?
At the library, I got in trouble for putting a cooking book in the women's section.
What do you call the closest plant to the sun? The hot ball.
What's the similarity between an emotional and a leaf?
The emo is still hanging.
What happened when the Japanese guy offered Logan Paul a high five?
He left him hanging.
The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza. Instead, they got a plane.
Why do orphans have no bruises?
Because they have no dad to beat them.