Worst Jokes Ever
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite meal? His left shoulder.
Why do orphans hate family-size candy?
Because they can't share it with their family.
Why did the doctor turn down the orphan?
He was a family physician.
Why can't an Asian play baseball?
'Cause they always eat the bat!
What's an orphan's least favorite store? Home Depot.
What's the difference between apples and orphans? Apples get picked.
Heyo, my children, hope you haven't forgotten about our cult!
Two boys were at a lake, and they went to a bush and saw a naked lady.
One ran away, the other one followed the one who ran and asked why he ran. The boy answered, "My mum told me if I saw a naked lady I would turn to stone. I ran away because I felt something get hard."
A teenager went into a creepy house with his 3 friends. Only 2 came out. Where are the others?
(Getting brutally murdered.)
Why can't a missing child play baseball? Cuz he doesn't know where home is.
What happens when a battery commits a crime? They get charged!
Why don't orphans have any friends?
Because they don't have homies.
What did Joe Biden say when he got pulled over?
I'm just a-Biden the law, officer.
I was trying to hang the lights when I accidentally kicked the chair.
My wife told me to treat her like a princess, so I got drunk and drove through the tunnel.
James Bond: Vodka martini.
Bartender: Shaken, not stirred.
James Bond: Do I look like I give a damn?
Someone in my class described the KKK as ghosts with pointy hats... I mean, he's not wrong.
What is an orphan's most hated baseball team? The Padres.
I thought God didn't make mistakes, but then I saw your face.
I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey, but then I turned myself around.