Worst Jokes Ever
What is the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus?
It only takes one nail to hang a painting.
What if your Corona test is neutral?
What can you give a white person that you can't give to a black person?
A black eye.
What's a prisoner's favorite game?
Hangman!
It's muffi time, 'cause I wanna die, die, die.
Did you know if you give a guy a plane ticket, he flies once, but if you push him out of a plane, he flies for the rest of his life.
Don't be sad, because that's das backwards and das not good.
What's worse than getting raped in a cemetery? Finding someone else's semen in your mom's corpse.
Q: Why did the Koala fall off the tree? A: Because it was dead.
Q: Why did the second Koala fall off the tree? A: Because it was hit by the first Koala.
Q: Why did the third Koala fall off the tree? A: Because it thought it was a game and joined in.
Ahem... if somebody you don't like, or somebody random just calls you in general,
answer the phone with this:
"Hello, thank you for choosing Mama's Pizzeria/Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce, how may I help you?"
or
"Hello, this is David's Orphanage, you make them, we take them, how may I help you?"
Some people's reactions are priceless, and then they wonder about your mental health.
What do you call a black comedian?
Dark Humor.
Why was Michael Jackson fired as a guitar teacher?
Because he fingered a minor.
Did you know penguins can actually fly if thrown hard enough... Just like children.
If a man is willing to try his hardest to give you the moon and stars, then ladies, you should be willing to give up Uranus.
Q: What's black, white and red all over?
A: A blushing zebra? No, Michael Jackson after a Pepsi advert.
I was asking people who knew Trump if he would win a second term. Stormy said, "No way, he doesn't have two in him!"
What happened when the cheetah took too many baths?
He became spotless!!!
I'm torn on the issue of abortion. I'm pro-abortion because it kills babies, but I'm against abortion because it gives women a choice.
Q: What did Donald Trump say after America gave him the boot?
A: What am I supposed to do with one boot?
When you turn off all the annoying beeping things in the hospital, and everyone starts sleeping better.