Worst Jokes Ever
I was at a train station and a woman ran up to me and asked, "Is this train running on time?" I said, "No, it runs on steam and coal."
Kurt Cobain's last job was a blow job. He blew his head clean off.
What's the worst thing to hear in a prison shower?
"Drop the soap, we've got you surrounded."
I killed 5 zombies and stabbed a vampire with a steak, and then I started to wonder why they were carrying bags of candy.
Hey girl, are you a farmer? Because you sure know how to raise a cock.
What do women and Nvidia have in common?
They both do not make very good drivers.
What did the bird say to the other bird?
Nothing, because birds can't talk.
Q: Why is China so bad at baseball?
A: They already ate the bat.
Why aren't there any stray cats in Chinatown?
There are, but they're just listed as "pork" on the menus.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
Why can't an orphan be gay?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Someone went up to an orphan and asked him why he was talking to the air. He said he was talking to his mom.
I would tell a 9/11 joke, but it would probably crash and burn.
"OK, son," he says. "It's as easy as counting to 5."
1. Pull down your pants. 2. Pull back your foreskin. 3. Pee in the toilet. 4. Put your foreskin back. 5. Pull up your pants.
From then on, every time the boy goes to the toilet, he counts from 1 to 5. One day, the father noticed his son was taking quite some time in the toilet. He went to check on him and overheard his son saying, "2,4,2,4,2,4,2,4."
A man walks into a bar and ends up with a concussion.
Maybe if he looked where he was going, he wouldn’t have hit that pole.
My father died in 9/11. It's such a shame. He was a great pilot. 😔
Why can’t orphans go on school field trips?
[Parent’s signature: __________]
Hello, I am Sflugo. I am opening the Pro Orphan Joke Club because a lot of people are saying to get rid of them, but we say NO! If you want to join, comment and say, "#SaveOrphanJokes."
What's the hardest thing to do?
Not kill your siblings. (Put the knives away ">:)")
What do 9/11 and gender have in common?
They used to be two, and now it's a sensitive topic.