Worst Jokes Ever
A man told his love interest she looked beautiful.
And then his love interest told him she had loads of things to tell him.
And after 3 minutes, she told him he looked fat, ugly, disgusting, creepy, and tiny.
Then the police came and arrested her for saying that.
What do you call diarrhea from a hot woman? Chocolate milk.
What do you call diarrhea from a fat woman? Arsenic.
Anime cats.
Howard Stern rules, b*tches!
How did Jesus kill himself?
He fell from his bike.
How many times did he die?
Once on a bike and once when he fell from a cloud in Heaven.
Why did the orphan kill himself when he found out who his dad was? Because he found out his dad was Donald Trump.
Five little monkeys jumping on the bed.
One fell off and bumped his head.
The momma called the doctor and the doctor said,
"Why the heck were my children jumping on a bed?"
Have you eaten at the restaurant on the Moon? It's got good food, but no atmosphere.
Hey, what's up?
What do you do when your dishwasher breaks down?
You punch her in the face and remind her of her duties.
At my sample place, I handed my wife a fork and I lost my job.
One night my brother asked me, "Am I a pro gamer?" I said, "No, you're not a Pro-grammer."
Yan nan ate my salty penis.
She saw me butt-naked, now she thinks I'm half Black.
Why did Spencer eat cheese?
Because he was Jewish.
What's the difference between a duck?
One of its legs are both the same!
Two cows are standing in a field.
Cow 1: Did you hear about the outbreak of mad cow disease?
Cow 2: Good thing I'm a helicopter.
You're so poor you stink like poo-poo in your doo-doo.
Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms.
What did Sarah get for Christmas? I dunno, she hasn't opened it yet.
Knock knock...
Who's there?
Not Sarah.
Knock knock.
Who is there?
Cows go.
Cows go who?
No, cows go moooooooooooo, not whooooooooooooooooooooo!