Worst Jokes Ever

I read the Brothers Grimm books, then I see a black figure reaping about.

I realized someone has died, but I don't do anything about it. I continue to read, and that's when I realized that I was one of the characters, in which at the end, dies.

1. Full name: John.

2. Proverb: work is not a rabbit, does not run.

3. Favorite meal: the sphinx with the sour cream.

4. Sexual orientation: sexually disorientated.

5. Mental health: mentally retarded.

6. Previous careers: funeral undertaking, after that two years in the circus as the main brown bear, after that in the church school for two years, after this experience five years as a screw in the jail for the worst criminals with the top degree of supervision and now working for the secret services in my home country after gaining the top-secret audit.

7. Favorite pets: dog, bumble bee named Maxo, a butterfly named Redwing and the lizard named Notail.

8. Favorite activities: washing the dishes, cutting the woods, vacuuming and playing hard rock.

9. Working motivation: none.

I hope that you will accept my curriculum vitae and that we will see each other soon already as new colleagues, I wish more or less. Kind regards, John.

The Demon when it gets summoned to earth only to find out it was a spelling mistake in Latin class. 😬

I got more followers than Charli, because I brought a bottle of filtered water and food through Africa.

What's the difference between a knife and me?

One has a point.

I was reading a book one day when I suddenly heard a sound. It was the Grim Reaper. I ignored it and continued reading my book. Suddenly, I realized that I was one of the main characters, which, at the end, dies.

I used to like fireworks, but I'm dead now. Fireworks look like a charm if you don't mind something a little ghostly.

What lies beneath your nose and is being picked on? Your boogers.

Me: What are we doing in HPE?

Friend: Fitness.

Me: Fitting deez nuts in your mouth.

What’s one food orphans can eat?

Homemade.

Two Chinese men walk into a bar.

"Owwwwwwwwwww," they say instead of "ouch."

Oil is soooooooo soooooooo cute 😍 ☺ 💓 💕 💖 ✨ 😍

I can't help it. Images look crazy but oil is soooooo cute!

Well, a lock and a key were going on vacation, but the key said, "Help me, I'm stuck!" and then the lock said, "I think I am in lock-shary."

Hi, my name is Unknown Guy! Please join my group for the picture I show you, we will do this every week!

Thanks, leave a comment or sign in using the sign in sheet that I have in Google Forms or own the website.

Hint: Pictures of woman.

Btw, for men only!

Doin' (DYM 34).

What’s the difference between an erection and Edward Holland? Nothing, they're both dicks.

Me: I have an arrow in my head.

My friend: What's the point of that?

Me: Of the arrow?

Friend: No!

Me: Probably the flint.

Your future.

If an orphan got hit, will they go tell their parents?

One Tuesday afternoon, Little Jonny decides he wants extra homework, so he went to his teacher and said, "Hello, can I have extra homework this week?"

The teacher replied with, "Sure, be at my house Friday afternoon to cut my lawn, polish the counters, scrub the baseboards, scrub and paint the walls!"

And Johnny replied with, "That's not what I meant, but at least I'll get paid!"

The teacher said, "How about $200 each job?"

Johnny replied with, "OK."

Friday afternoon at her house, after Johnny does all the jobs, he asked for his payment and the teacher laughed and said, "You do know that Tuesday was April Fools' Day, right?"

Boyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

A girl and dog get dropped off at an orphanage. Why was she crying before she went in? Because the people came back for their dog!